My partner asked me in a text if we were romantically involved but we haven’t necessarily spoken about what we are yet. They’ve asked me multiple times if I liked them and I’ve asked the same thing but it was the first time they mentioned romance.
I think I want to know more about what romantically involved means, does it mean “relationship” or is it just we make love but aren’t into commitment. I was too scared to ask them the last time I saw them what we were because I didn’t feel the time was right and I’m too nervous.
That was the exact play by play I used after going out with girlfriend after a month. She's my wife now. It's a good strategem 100% track record.
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Those are the words of someone who wants a more intimate relationship, not of someone who wants to maintain the existing status quo and doesn't want the other person to get closer. Who cares about true love/affection distinction and why does it matter when it comes to defining your relationship. You two probably want to call each other boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other and make it "official". Do so with a proper ambush.
Also this varies from person to person, but love is something I develop after getting into a relationship, not before.
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If the feeling's mutual, you might as well do it. It's risk-free. Just sit down and ask "I like you. Do you want to be my boyfriend?"
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It would've been helpful to mention that in the initial post. This is outside of my paygrade now since I don't have any experience with it. Hopefully someone here does though.
You should ask them that question, not lemmy.
Be direct. Be honest.