Most people are a lot less shallow than you think when it comes to economics and mental or physical well-being. I suppose if you still live with your parents, your best bet is going to be to go to the other person or a motel, though I think that's best discussed with them, not me.
Nevertheless, no one is entitled to have sex with other people, and no, you're not fucking suffering because you haven't gotten laid. If you crave relationships and romantic interaction with another person, then you need to actually talk to other people. You can't just expect it to magically descend from the heavens or spite the world because it doesn't. Life is not a 90s romcom, love is what you make of it, not what Nora Roberts assigns you ten pages into the book.
Please seek therapy for this. It is very clear that you have far, far, far deeper issues than simply not having sex.
Grindr is a single tap away, it genuinely is that easy to get laid. If you are experiencing regular suicidal ideation over your lack of romantic experience, you need to seek professional help.
Don't worry, I get what you're saying. The person you're responding to doesn't and probably will never understand. I'd be mad as fuck if I wrote that paragraph and someone's only response was "get therapy lolz" so good work on keeping your cool lmao.
I could be totally wrong, but I'm going to guess you're someone for whom sex is easy to come by, and so you'll never really be able to understand the perspective of someone for whom having sex or other relationships is difficult. I don't necessarily disagree with what you're saying (I'm not the person you're responding to) but it's amazing and insulting just how out of touch you come off as. To have sex requires a lot of personal effort on part of the person who wants sex, and that's true, but it is absolutely no where near as easy as you make it seem, especially in the modern western world where we are all atomized and alienated from each other.
Like you mentioned earlier "just use dating apps or hookup subreddits" which is just so detached from (heterosexual) men's experiences on these platforms that it's almost hilarious. I could go into more detail but you seem very set in your own perspective so I don't think there's a point.
Also wild that these studies only ever consider men's sex lives. Women are just assumed to have perfect sex lives (when in reality its just less socially acceptable for women to complain they can't get laid even though men have way higher standards when it comes to dating than women)
Not picking on you specifically, just thought it was funny.
Yes. It does require effort to pursue, initiate, and maintain relationships. I'm not saying it doesn't, but your also not going to have any relationships if you put in no effort. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
The issue isn't about not having sex. There have been multiple extended, multi-year-long periods of my adult life where I have not been in any relationships or had sex. And you know what? I was fine. I was fine with it most of the time! And most people are, most of the time.
The issue when you're in a place where you're experiencing distress from your lack of romantic relationships at the time is not actually about the lack of sex or companionship, it's that you feel an intense, unnatural pressure to have those things that you don't. Just take it easy, it's no good to stress out about this stuff. I've also found it's way easier to pursue relationships when you're not pressuring yourself about it. Just go with the flow and it will be okay.
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Most people are a lot less shallow than you think when it comes to economics and mental or physical well-being. I suppose if you still live with your parents, your best bet is going to be to go to the other person or a motel, though I think that's best discussed with them, not me.
Nevertheless, no one is entitled to have sex with other people, and no, you're not fucking suffering because you haven't gotten laid. If you crave relationships and romantic interaction with another person, then you need to actually talk to other people. You can't just expect it to magically descend from the heavens or spite the world because it doesn't. Life is not a 90s romcom, love is what you make of it, not what Nora Roberts assigns you ten pages into the book.
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Please seek therapy for this. It is very clear that you have far, far, far deeper issues than simply not having sex.
Grindr is a single tap away, it genuinely is that easy to get laid. If you are experiencing regular suicidal ideation over your lack of romantic experience, you need to seek professional help.
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Don't worry, I get what you're saying. The person you're responding to doesn't and probably will never understand. I'd be mad as fuck if I wrote that paragraph and someone's only response was "get therapy lolz" so good work on keeping your cool lmao.
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About 1 in 3 men ages 18 to 24 years reported no sexual activity in the past year, according to a new studyTrusted Source published in JAMA Network Open. (Note: this is pre covid)
I could be totally wrong, but I'm going to guess you're someone for whom sex is easy to come by, and so you'll never really be able to understand the perspective of someone for whom having sex or other relationships is difficult. I don't necessarily disagree with what you're saying (I'm not the person you're responding to) but it's amazing and insulting just how out of touch you come off as. To have sex requires a lot of personal effort on part of the person who wants sex, and that's true, but it is absolutely no where near as easy as you make it seem, especially in the modern western world where we are all atomized and alienated from each other.
Like you mentioned earlier "just use dating apps or hookup subreddits" which is just so detached from (heterosexual) men's experiences on these platforms that it's almost hilarious. I could go into more detail but you seem very set in your own perspective so I don't think there's a point.
Only 1 in 3?
Also wild that these studies only ever consider men's sex lives. Women are just assumed to have perfect sex lives (when in reality its just less socially acceptable for women to complain they can't get laid even though men have way higher standards when it comes to dating than women)
Not picking on you specifically, just thought it was funny.
Yes. It does require effort to pursue, initiate, and maintain relationships. I'm not saying it doesn't, but your also not going to have any relationships if you put in no effort. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
The issue isn't about not having sex. There have been multiple extended, multi-year-long periods of my adult life where I have not been in any relationships or had sex. And you know what? I was fine. I was fine with it most of the time! And most people are, most of the time.
The issue when you're in a place where you're experiencing distress from your lack of romantic relationships at the time is not actually about the lack of sex or companionship, it's that you feel an intense, unnatural pressure to have those things that you don't. Just take it easy, it's no good to stress out about this stuff. I've also found it's way easier to pursue relationships when you're not pressuring yourself about it. Just go with the flow and it will be okay.
Removed by mod