Transitioning without letting family know is hard, I was lucky to have a supportive family, but I know some girls who really struggled. I have never heard that about laser vis a vis laser, I started basically at the same time I did HRT, who told you this? Most support groups are virtual now, but the fact that they are regionally based means its possible to meet up with people you meet there with some reasonable safety, though the car lack is a serious hiccup; this stupid fucking car society. The least I can say is that it is a way to get plugged into a local support network, even if you don't find yourself availing the support group aspect of it a ton. There is something to be said for being able to put out a call and have someone local be able to give you a lift on short notice or a couch to surf on, I see at least one request like this a week come through the listserv for my local group and they almost always get some support.

I feel you about shaving so hard, I had a massive denial beard before transitioning that my father always bragged about "thanks dad...." There are ways to better get a smooth shave if you need to, shaving after a hot shower can help expose more of the shafts of hair, as well as shaving twice, once with the grain and again against the grain of hair. Some foundation then can do the job of covering any subsurface coloration or afternoon shadow. Unfortunately the only real solution is to burn the little fuckers out like the facial kulaks they are. So I would definitely look into why whoever told you to wait did so.