I call myself “ostensibly cishet” because I look very much like a straight man, but I certainly don’t feel like a man and live in an area where my life would be destroyed if I referred to myself as something else
My use of language in the above sucks, but as a kid, I would always hang out at “the girls table” or in “the girls section” because the guys would always pick on me. It’s made life super difficult because when I meet a friend who is a woman now and ask them to hangout, their assumption is always that I want a partnership.
I literally only have one female friend who isn’t like this. It’s gotta be the fucking patriarchy right
Anyways, it’s so fucking lonely.
Why are apps only for people looking to fuck/get into relationships :/
Yep, definitely. I do have some friends who are men but often we I don't really like most men I meet. I've also been confused for gay often in the past (am bi, prefer femme, even pickier with men sexually than socially).
More recently I do also feel like some think I'm looking for a partner, or unicorn hunting. Which I'm not, but I am a poly slut so that is a possibility, which definitely complicate things.
i hope it's not insensitive to ask, how does the being confused for gay tend to manifest? they make like gay jokes or describe you as gay when introducing you to others or? i'm having a hard time imagining how that would look irl...
It doesn't happen much anymore but people would just ask "are you gay?" Or assume I was closeted or something.
Homophobic remarks too, back in high school, calling me the f-slur or gay (derogatory)
wow, just up in your face about it huh? yeah the f***** bothered me quite a bit, it didn't help that kids would say "im just saying bundle of sticks! why do you care so much??