:19::84:

  • sappho [she/her]
    ·
    2 years ago

    People spend too much time staring at 2D manufactured and groomed images instead of at real human beings

    When I was like 14 I remember being like "uh I guess I don't really find chubby girls attractive" but then in college I went out, actually hooked up with people, and learned the error of my ways

    • The_Walkening [none/use name]
      ·
      edit-2
      2 years ago

      Honestly male perspectives on their ideal sexual partner's appearance has cockblocked more men more than some evil feminist agenda.

      • Ligma_Male [comrade/them]
        ·
        2 years ago

        is it really a block if they're not interested in the first place? I carry a lot of the baggage of beauty standards i was indoctrinated with and it seems real weird to say i should miss something I don't want.

        or are you talking about chasers who are terrified to be seen in public with who they're really attracted to?

        • Llituro [he/him, they/them]
          ·
          2 years ago

          is it really a block if they’re not interested in the first place?

          I mean, yeah, I'd say so. The point is that men's standards for women's beauty are based on a simulation of women and not real women as they exist in the world. I don't think it's moralizing to recognize that as a problem, where people have trouble being attracted to actual real world people that otherwise meet their general preferences for a sexual partner because they expect the manufacture perfection of an image.

          • Ligma_Male [comrade/them]
            ·
            2 years ago

            idk, not to horny post but i have different standards for... erotic materials... and actually being in a room with someone because those general preferences do matter. A picture or video doesn't have much for personality or intellectual fulfillment. That said, there's just no shot for a cool person that's physically repulsive if you want physical arousal from a partner. (speaking as a straight-passing allo)

            you're getting dangerously close to saying people should be attracted to people they aren't attracted to.

            • Llituro [he/him, they/them]
              ·
              2 years ago

              Not to be too aggressive in interpreting language, but it's interesting that you wanted to couch erotic materials as being potentially uncouth but not the phrase "different standards." I don't think anyone is arguing that you have to find any particular person attractive, or even any particular image or simulation or simulacrum of a person to be attractive. However, we can recognize that a person's sexual desires are shaped not just by their genetics but by the conditions of their socialization and the development of their psychology. So as materialists, we can observe that the presentation of sexual media that exaggerates what normal human beings in a society look like, by an atomized process of producing that which is most immediately hedonic to consume, has at least some impact on how people go about pursuing real sexual relationships and who with.

              Which is to say that your ideas of standards and "physical repulsion" are dependent on a wide variety of factors, the most predominate and structural of which outside of genetics are those created by capitalism. We're talking about people whose sexual experience is so online that they don't have any interest in pursuing any person around them.

              • Ligma_Male [comrade/them]
                ·
                2 years ago

                yes i directly acknowledge this when i said I'm carrying the garbage that was handed to me by society.

                that doesn't change the part where none of us are interested in people we aren't attracted to, regardless of the contingent beauty/wanting-sex-with standards we develop and whether those are aligned with the prevailing culture or not.

                • Llituro [he/him, they/them]
                  ·
                  2 years ago

                  That's all fine, I was just trying to answer the initial question: is it truly a cock block if the dude isn't interested in someone in the first place. And I'm answering that I think yeah, if someone wants to fuck in general, but refuses to even pursue potential partners because they have become unable to be aroused by anything but the sign and nothing real, then yeah, that's like def a self cock block, or at least capitalism fucking people up in a way that makes it hard for them to do anything humanly normal, which is certainly also true. You can disagree with me, I just thought it was an interesting question to try and look at.

                  • Ligma_Male [comrade/them]
                    ·
                    2 years ago

                    in my cultural context a cock block is when somebody is trying to hook up with someone and a third party (or, more loosely, event etc e.g. "I was going to go see your dad but that tornado warning cock blocked me") and I think that trying after someone specific in the first place is a necessary component in a way that "health class birth videos traumatized me so i'm not interested in hooking up with your mom" wouldn't qualify because the initial interest was never there.

                    if your understanding of the term is different then this has been an uninteresting linguistic disagreement instead of a mildly interesting philosophy thing. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

      • rubpoll [she/her]
        ·
        2 years ago

        Honestly male perspectives on their ideal sexual partner’s appearance has cockblocked more men more than some evil feminist agenda.

        This is another one of those things I wish I could stamp on my own forehead, listening to my guy friends talk about how much they hate being single followed by descriptions of people they never called back for the lamest reasons imaginable.

        • Sen_Jen [they/them]
          ·
          2 years ago

          "Why can't I get a girlfriend?"

          "Anyway here's why all feminists are overweight and ugly and have coloured hair and I hate them"