"Comparison is the thief of joy," as they say, but it's not as simple as knowing that and being immediately freed from its clutches.
I looked up a former friend from high school today and found she's now super successful with her own startup doing cool science shit that might actually improve people's lives. When I look at my own life and what I've done in the same time it feels so insignificant, worthless even.
Normally I'm content to just chug along my path and try my best to better the world, but I've got some wounds surrounding this friend and our falling out (largely due to my own insecurities and inability to reconcile my unrequited crush on her :cringe: ) that never healed. Even thinking about her makes me feel so wretched, and all the more hateful towards myself for feeling that way, for being so weak and ill-accomplished. Is there anything to do but just try to block it out of my mind? I wish I could tear out and burn the piece of me that cares about this.
Edit: Thank you to everyone who's responded to this. Talking about it has helped me feel a lot better and think about some goals for how I want my life to go and what I want to prioritize moving forward. Who knew internet strangers could be so helpful?
Nihilism's the only way to go. It's always healthy to remember that the whole of human effort will lead to nothing and everyone is equally insignificant and irrelevant. Do as much or as little as you want to, it all amounts to the same thing. Insignificance is incredibly liberating. I became exponentially happier when I stopped thinking that I mattered. When you realise that there is nobody on any plane of existence that truly cares about what you or anybody else does, then you can do anything.
:yes-chad:
It's funny because this is my attitude like 90% of the time - we'll all be forgotten eventually so just love as much as you can, try to make the world a little better, and make art. This particular issue just has a special way of boring through my personal growth until I'm 15 years old again.
Stop posting my thoughts on this public forum, it's extremely irritating.
Jk, I feel you comrade. We do our best but some things get through
:brow: if you didn't want me posting them you shouldn't have been transmitting them so brightly on the astral plane
spoiler
:meow-hug:
Damn this is pretty liberating. Guess the whole Earth will be engulfed eventually by the sun anyway.
The problem with nihilism is that I don’t get to be alive to witness the death of the universe but I get to be alive to witness other people’s successes