first one fuck up for free? If it’s true, constant asking about if they hide anything else would be completely maddening (if I were in their place). You either continue live in doubts, or just figure it out and forgive (prolly having story why they’ve spend it and then hidden it would be helpful)
That’s kinda oof, maybe sort of general ”don’t wanna think about it” with self-destructive “fuck it, already owe that much” or some kind of shame. At least, that how I could have gotten into that situation. Dunno how to go from there, tell them they can trust you or whatevs
echoing this. it's an odd mess up because it wasn't really one thing OP's partner did in secret - it was hundreds of purchases over years. they knew they were racking up a debt that they couldn't pay and hid it for as long as they could. i would find it difficult to forgive and forget
This is the correct answer. Better to rip off the band-aid now rather than later. This wasn't a one-time fuckup, it was a deliberate fraud perpetrated over multiple years.
R/relationshipadvice calling. It’s unexplainable from outside behavior, but not deliberate fraud, cmon. Deliberate fraud is when you “laugh all the way to the bank”, not spend on take outs over the years.
first one fuck up for free? If it’s true, constant asking about if they hide anything else would be completely maddening (if I were in their place). You either continue live in doubts, or just figure it out and forgive (prolly having story why they’ve spend it and then hidden it would be helpful)
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That’s kinda oof, maybe sort of general ”don’t wanna think about it” with self-destructive “fuck it, already owe that much” or some kind of shame. At least, that how I could have gotten into that situation. Dunno how to go from there, tell them they can trust you or whatevs
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echoing this. it's an odd mess up because it wasn't really one thing OP's partner did in secret - it was hundreds of purchases over years. they knew they were racking up a debt that they couldn't pay and hid it for as long as they could. i would find it difficult to forgive and forget
This is the correct answer. Better to rip off the band-aid now rather than later. This wasn't a one-time fuckup, it was a deliberate fraud perpetrated over multiple years.
R/relationshipadvice calling. It’s unexplainable from outside behavior, but not deliberate fraud, cmon. Deliberate fraud is when you “laugh all the way to the bank”, not spend on take outs over the years.