This feels like a joke GTA would have made 10-15 years ago.
It's a request that the emergency services not try to remove you from the vehicle.
Won’t need the jaws of life because your head is going to explode against the bullet proof glass and armored framing when you get tboned, because nothing is absorbing all the energy
Love to buy a car that was designed by Kevin McCallister to stop the wet bandits
Follow-up question: is this function in any way accessible through the internet? It would be such a shame if some hacker made a bunch of America's Swinest taze themselves :(
That 100% sounds like it would be far more of a problem to whatever dipshit who buys it than the hypothetical scenario that the owner might get into one day if he intentionally drives it into an antifa gathering
You couldn't, with a gun to my fucking head, stop me from pressing the smoke screen button the MOMENT I sit down in that thing
I'm gonna be using the pepper spray dispenser on the salesman.
Turning a big dial that says "cyberpunk dystopia" on it and constantly looking back at the audience for approval is what this is
Ecogecko does an incredible job of describing this phenomenon of suburban battle tanks in this video
the United States is in some ways becoming a medieval society, in which people live and work in the modern equivalent of castles---gated communities, apartment building with doormen and office building with guards---and try to shield themselves while traveling between them. They do this by riding in sport utility vehicles, which look armored, and by trying to appear as intimidating as possible to potential attackers.
:geordi-yes:
:you-are-a-serf:
We're in fuckin 1320 motherfucker. You are a serf. Bitch, you live in Alsace. You are a peasant. You need to give your fuckin' lord the grain. Your fucking children, you've had 15 children. You've never taken a bath. You've literally never. washed. your. penis. You've never used toilet paper. Motherfucker, you have worms. You are dying. You've had 40 children, 3 of them are alive. 2 of them are child soldiers in the Duke's army.
Bitch, the greatest thing you can hope for is to die at the old age of 36. You fucking can't read. You don't know what TV is. If you were transported into today, you would be the worst gamer of all time. You don't know shit. You literally probably don't even know what the direction 'left' is. I'm sure some Medieval guy is gonna get mad at me for this, bitch I've been to the Renaissance Fair. I've eaten a large turkey wing, which the Juggalos call 'bitch beaters', which I think is problematic but a funny thing to call them.
Motherfucker, you gotta recognize where you are, and then you gotta get passed that. You gotta be unemotional. You can't sink into this hole. You live in the oubliette. Your job is to crawl up the ladder, motherfucker. You live in the HOLE. You're in the HOLE. You are a RAT. And the rat, when he's in the hole gets fucked. People only throw trash in the hole.
You need to eat a body. And you need to carry the plague. And you need to carry a plague around this whole world, that will change this whole fuckin world. And all your enemies will vomit black bile and will choke on blood and will grow boils and die. But only if you get together with your other RATS. And you come up with some kind of super plague, to fuckin end your enemies and...
End. This. Nightmare.
@aaaaaaadjsf isn't South Africa like this quite a bit already? The worst income inequality in the world iirc and all the houses seem to have bars on the windows and sometimes even barbed wire.
Yes 100%.
The new place I moved into has exactly what you said, burglar bars on the windows (even though it's a couple stories up) and barbed wire fencing. And it looks minimal compared to all the electric fencing and alarm systems around it on other properties and apartment buildings
Basically every rich suburb is a gated community now, though you're still allowed to drive though, just get stopped at the gates for a few seconds. The poorer suburbs can't really have that, so they have community watch/policing forums and stuff.
Since you're here, could you try and explain the South African commuter rail system to me, or at least get me a few schedules? Metrorail looks like it has the potential to be really good, but I would guess that it's held back by a great deal of racism. The online schedules are just dreadful and I'd love to know what the service is actually like. South Africa actually has a pretty decent rail network by the looks of things but it's hard to find info about it.
Welcome to South African government websites! Some of the worst things invented in history.
Metrorail is slow, overcrowded, and effected by corruption, lack of investment, sabotage, arson and vandalism and poor maintenance. The trains are often late, and people feel unsafe using them, it can be dangerous at times with regards to crime. It says a lot that people will prefer to take minibus taxis than the trains, if they can afford it.
The nice trains, like the Gautrain, are way too expensive for your average South African.
The rail network is decent but massively underfunded and gutted by austerity and corruption, so everything is transported by truck, which destroys the roads and highways.
Obviously the structural racism of apartheid has never been properly addressed, you'll almost never see a white person take a metro train or ride a minibus taxi, these services are unofficially maligned for poor black South Africans
I think the schedules were last updated in 2012? I thought these websites were unofficial sites, goddamn are they terrible.
Is there any part of the suburban rail system that runs a bit like a metro, i.e. trains every 10-15 minutes all day? Thanks for commenting, I'm always trying to expand my railway knowledge.
Gautrain could probably be a post unto itself. It's a little bit easier to research but the quick answer is that it's the rich people train. Please feel free to talk more about South African railways on c/urbanism, a community that I hoped would be about sharing cool train/transit facts and pics but has just turned into a repost circlejerk.
Is there any part of the suburban rail system that runs a bit like a metro, i.e. trains every 10-15 minutes all day?
Pretty much only the Gautrain if I remember correctly This is the schedule. And no midnight or early morning trains.
Gautrain is the rich people train, and it's definitely not utilised as much as it should be, because a lot of rich folks prefer driving their fancy cars. And it's only in one province really, between an airport and two cities. As to why we only have this, well, we're broke and very corrupt. Without the 2010 FIFA world cup, we probably wouldn't even have the Gautrain. Public transportation situation is really bad, that's why the minibus taxi mafia is king.
It's a great grift tbh. Underneath all the tacticool shit the car itself is literally just a 2023 Cadillac Escalade, only for $200,000 more than the Escalade's MSSRP and with all the armor and gadgets added on, its its fuel efficiency must be dismal.
If you sent this over to an actual warzone, no insurgent would choose this shit over a three decade old Toyota Hilux.
Nothing can stop you! Except a patch of loose sand. Or too steep of an incline. Or high-centering. Or turning too quickly. Or being more than a mile from a gas station.
The virgin whatever the fuck this is vs the chad Toyota hilux technical :technical:
Especially because bulletproof in most cases for these shitty cars means up to 7.62 x 51 and no self respecting guerrilla fighter would put anything less than a DShK on their Hilux.
We’re already selling armored civilian cars with insurgency gear lmao, too bad that when the country actually collapses they’ll all get owned by someone in a third floor apartment firing their pistol through the car roof at the occupants
Also of note is the observation that modern US trucks would be the worst technicals of all time
Also of note is the observation that modern US trucks would be the worst technicals of all time
The year is 2047
Civil war 2 finally breaks out, going to own the antifa libs with my armored Canyonero
Fills up tank with 47 gallons of the world's little remaining gasoline at $18/gallon
Drives 6 blocks into enemy controlled area, fuel tank now half empty
Road that hasn't been maintained since the 70s collapses under the 18 ton weight of the truck
Try and get out but the door won't open because the Tesla servers were down after Elon Musk replaced all of the server employees with a picture of Big Chungus
Some guy chucks a molotov made out of garage hooch on my bunker, killing me painfully and slowly
:dumpster-fire::frothingfash::dumpster-fire:
Russian tanks in the First Battle of Grozhny, but with this thing instead.
Instead of Khankala Airbase they’re sinking resources into defending the strip mall with Hobby Lobby and Cracker Barrel “for its tactical position”
Honestly surprised chuds don't understand how flimsy armored cars are compared to actual tanks. Like you have fucking windows in this thing, you aren't going to survive any explosion more powerful than a hand grenade (which you would have good odds surviving in an ordinary car anyways, shrapnel isn't actually very penetrative compared to bullets). The killdozer comparison I've seen is actually hilarious because killdozer guy used alternating layers of concrete and steel for a vehicle that couldn't be stopped without calling in the actual military (though it was so heavy that a floor collapsed under it before that came to pass). This thing would be lucky to survive a .50 cal through the side window, let alone driving over a landmine like the description seems to imply it's ready for. Wouldn't have saved Luis Carrero Blanco, I can tell you that for free.
Reminded of Hank Hill's dad demanding to test his nail gun on Jimmy Carter's armored car, and being disappointed when it punches right through the safety glass.
something that is not rated for rocket propelled grenades :theory-gary:
I don't see anything about the engine being swapped out with a more powerful one which means it'll struggle a lot more to move lol
probably wear out the transmission a lot faster too with all that extra armor and reinforcement, like an even more pathetic imitation of a panther tank
