• Erika3sis [she/her, xe/xem]
    ·
    edit-2
    4 months ago

    Here's an edited version of my rendition that replaces the lines I find problematic:


    You are the voice stuck in my head
    I was alone, You held my palms
    You broke them, clawed them 'till they bled
    All while You sang Satanic psalms
    You are my liege, my crushing dread
    And I'm Your lonely, shameful serf
    I prayed each night before bed*
    For my own death and for rebirth

    |:You're the puppeteer in my head
    You're nobody's worry
    You pull strings like I'm already dead
    'Till I dig my grave my shame will bury:|

    A mausoleum in Moskva
    Still shone by Soviet svetophors
    In deepest dark dreams of toska
    With melancholic metaphors
    My head fills with Your chilling laugh
    When witches dance the Horovod
    Their pagan pleasures, strange and saph
    No longer drown me, Voievode

    |:You're the puppeteer in my head
    You're nobody's worry
    You pull strings like I'm already dead
    'Till I dig my grave my shame will bury:|

    |:I dig my grave my shame will bury
    My grave:|

    Between us there's no division
    Your prison is my prize
    Yet I can't fulfill Your vision
    So I'll stab Your staring eyes
    Is this freedom, is this death
    I groan as my fingers rot**
    On my neck, I feel Your breath
    Ever damned, just as You've wrought

    |:You're the puppeteer in my head
    You're nobody's worry
    You pull strings like I'm already dead
    'Till I dig my grave my shame will bury:|

    |:My grave:|


    *Originally "Rodnover shrines, there I just pled"

    **Originally "I groan 'neath the kolovrat"

    A side note is that I wrote these lyrics as a way of creatively venting my struggles with my gender identity.