As in, absolutely no "close" friend, because turns out one was an absolute cunt, the other one simply didn't seem to care at all. No family either because I've met with a man contaminated with coronavirus, and had to isolate myself to protect my parents. Nor any significant other because of various factors that I won't get into.

So that's it. 2020 is the first year where I literally have no one left to talk/confess to. As a gift, I am offered a fucking coronavirus test, and that'll probably be it. I can't even cry anymore, because I feel so numb. I wonder if anyone has truly delved so deep into misanthropy as I did., becaues as it turns out, finding decent people to talk to is an actual nightmare, and I just can't be arsed anymore to go back to Tinder/Okcupid, or to hang out with my classmates. So loneliness for the foreseeable future it is.

That's it, I posted this here because there's no mental health sub, god fucking knows why. Have a good night, because I sure as hell won't.

Ok I'm legit amazed at the amount of answers, thank you all, you beautiful liberals. I'll try to answer to all of you.

  • ShitPosterior [none/use name]
    ·
    4 years ago

    Happy Birthday m8. It's a very isolated/isolating time we find ourselves in, but we've got each other. It's understandable that you're feeling down, birthdays are "supposed" to be celebrations with a bunch of people - but it's just a day. This too will pass.

    Big love your way, feel free to plaster the board with your thoughts 💭

    • Jorick [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      4 years ago

      That's surely a far more positive way to look at things compared to how I tend to view them currently. Yet I can't help but think that once I get rid of depression and all of my ills, I'll remain a nihilist regardless, considering how insignificant and devoid of meaning everything seems to be, at least at the time I'm writing this. I can only hope the LSD will do its job and help me save myself.

      But anyway, thank you.

      • ShitPosterior [none/use name]
        ·
        4 years ago

        Nihilism can be freeing too - if everything is insignificant and meaningless you're pretty much free, the typical pressures & stresses of life shouldn't burden you. Peak nihilism you can just skip out on anything to go listen to the birds instead, fuck it. It's totally meaningless & simultaneously its all the meaning we've got. If LSD teaches you anything it's surely that we're all connected.. The idea of seperation is a joke & a curse, we're all results of the various conditions we find ourselves of & in.

        Prolly never get rid of all the ills, we've all got our battles to fight & everyone has different weights bogging em down, hangups, you name it.

        Join an org, helping others is really something and building community and actually putting tangible effort towards making a world that more reflects justice, equality, freedom, solidarity... It feels good. It's empowering.

        Also obligatory eat right & exercise to the best of your abilities - I get bogged down & have to drag my ass out of depressive holes. I'll be depressedly exercising for a few days wanting to die and after a week the metabolism kicks in & the good brain drugs kick in. It's like a fucking jump start to my broken assed brain.

        We need you, the world needs you. You're doing great, shits fucking hard right now & we must persevere. We've got to build coolitions & rise above and resist despair. Demand a better world, fight for a better world, make a better world. Plant a fuckin tree or two!

        Welcome to 24 friend, excited to see what you get up to. We're all in this together and WE'RE GOING TO GROW OUR HUMANITY TOGETHER.

        • ShitPosterior [none/use name]
          ·
          edit-2
          4 years ago

          Nihilism is dope, my brother is a total nihilist and he's by far the best person I've ever met. He's turned it into a sort of zen superpower, just the right amount of detachedness to extract brilliant takes & never get too invested or sucked into anything.

          Hope you're day is going well ❤️❤️

          Lol meant that as a reply to jor, not myself 😉