first of all, why do I have to tell the chef how to make the steak? "medium rare"? "well done"? those are words made up by wizards or something. second of all I don't like how they taste. they're super expensive and they just taste so boring. chicken goated steak boring. I'm in my early 20s so I'm getting used to some "acquired taste" things slowly like wine and coffee but steak is still so bland.

  • KobaCumTribute [she/her]
    ·
    10 days ago

    You literally have to be a Michelin Chef

    A michelin chef would like, serve it on wood chips with some potting soil and like a pate and caviar aspic or some shit, and it would be the most revolting thing you've ever tasted but it cost $1000 so you pretend it's amazing to save face.

    it has enough natural flat and can absorb way more flavor than dry ass chicken breast.

    Literally just marinade it in oil, vinegar, and spices first, then cook it with plenty of garlic. Or just fry it plain with some oil then chop it up and toss it in curry or some other sort of flavorful sauce/stew to soak up that flavor.

    Generally the solution to something being bland on its own is to just use spices and sauces and work out how to cook them into it. That's what's so wrong with the like steak sort of approach to cooking where you're just throwing something at a pan and what comes out is kind of mediocre but palatable, because it's trying to turn laziness and not using spices into some intricate art of how to make that not turn out bad when you could instead just use better methods and also spices and get something much better with barely any more work.

    • gay_king_prince_charles [she/her, he/him]
      ·
      10 days ago

      A michelin chef would like, serve it on wood chips with some potting soil and like a pate and caviar aspic or some shit, and it would be the most revolting thing you've ever tasted but it cost $1000 so you pretend it's amazing to save face.

      Lmao, that's not what Michelin starred food tastes like. Also, if you count Bib Gourmand food it's not even that expensive.

      • KobaCumTribute [she/her]
        ·
        10 days ago

        The wood chip and dirt thing is from an actual michelin starred restaurant showing off their deranged, awful food in a video lmao (granted it wasn't served on the food, it was served in little cups next to it with the recommendation that people huff the dirt to make the food taste "earthy"). I did make up the pate and caviar aspic thing, but that was just to characterize all the other awful things they were including that I couldn't remember the specifics.

            • gay_king_prince_charles [she/her, he/him]
              ·
              10 days ago

              I do think that food and presentation is an art form and I would like to see fine dining made more common and affordable so it's easier to make and experience said art, even the questionable looking sort.

    • gueybana [any]
      ·
      10 days ago

      But my point is you have to be a fucking wizard to get chicken to absorb as much flavor as a beef. Marinate in a ziploc bag overnight and you’re still not even half way there to making a juicy, flavorful chicken breast.

      • KobaCumTribute [she/her]
        ·
        10 days ago

        Beef has its own extremely distinct flavor that can make it unwieldy when you just want something to give a meal a bit more substance. Chicken is like tofu in that you can just sort of adaptably fit it in and have it complement rather than take over a dish, whereas beef really needs a treatment like kofta to bring it into line by overpowering it with onions, garlic, and other spices.

      • Huldra [they/them, it/its]
        ·
        edit-2
        10 days ago

        I mean the juicy part is gonna be more about cooking than marinades or other prepwork, except maybe butterflying it so it cooks faster and more even.

        Short of literally injecting fluid or some goofy stuff like that, the breast isn't gonna get much more juicy than where it starts, and while cooking it definitely isn't trivial it's not anything more than basic experience and skills applied.

        And for flavoring it's probably easier for the most part to make a nice sauce separate to the chicken breast and add that on top.

      • Edamamebean [she/her]
        ·
        10 days ago

        The simple solution to this is to not eat chicken breast. Dark meat is cheaper, easier to cook, tastier, and better in pretty much every way. The only reason people eat chicken breast is cause it's lean meat so they think it's healthy.