Go fucking fuck yourself you fucking piece of shit. Talking about other people's sOcIaL uNdeRsTandIng while you're fucking misgendering people AND JUSTIFYING IT AS IF YOU'RE A FUCKING VICTIM once you're called on it. You're rancid scum and I hope we get fucking defederated so we don't have to deal with filth like you.
I have to smash through the wall like Hbomberguy right now
Show
"DO YOU FUCK DUDES? AnomalousBit?"
Do you go around telling other people that you fuck dudes? What do other people assume you mean when you say that you fuck dudes?
You could have just been like "Yeah you're right, sorry I didn't mean to misgender you." but instead you doubled down on being a transphobic dickhead and literally proved my point about liberals being shitbags in the process.
No, it wouldn't be a problem if he said he fucked dudes. The implication though is that "dudes" is a gendered term. The complaint is that she was misgendered by someone who then doubled down on the misgendering. Her statement was not homophobic.
In my experience, sexual inferences are the fastest way to educate someone who doesn't see a word as being gendered, but I can see how what they said could be read as using gay sexual activity in a negative way to someone not reading this thread and skimmed over the rest of the text in that reply.
Playing dumb is used by bigots as a shield to continue their bigotry unimpeded. Not allowing any room for them to play dumb is the only way to reach those kind of people.
What they are conveying is that "dude" is clearly not a gender-neutral term, as a straight guy would agree that they "fuck people", weird as the phrasing is, but not that they "fuck dudes." It demonstrates that they themselves don't perceive the social understanding of the term "dude" as gender neutral, not that "fucking dudes" is bad. It could also be used to debate a lesbian by the same token.
Maybe if you lived in any of the countries you disparage all day long
Most of the users on Hexbear are American and a decent number of the remainder are Brits and Aussies. Our criticisms do not come from having never received the privilege of witnessing these countries being shit first-hand, as much as you might like to pretend it's only those dirty foreigners not understanding your national glory.
So the foreigner part is self-evident, and I think the "second-world", "potato vodka," etc. covers the "dirty" pretty plainly. I don't know why I'm even saying this, because basically what I'm doing is just teaching you to dogwhistle more effectively, but on the other hand this post is on lemmy, so hopefully I'm helping to point this out to other people so they will be more aware of these things when you and your ilk take your next crack at it.
I don't know a single trans person that views dude as a gender neutral term, the only people spouting that nonsense are transphobic cis dudes like you who make up excuses to misgender and harass us. Go die in a house fire, reactionary cissie shit.
Real talk from a very trans-supportive communist: is this universal? I definitely grew up in a conservative environment but definitely was under the impression that I and the trans people I am close to all thought dude was a term of endearment when used amongst friends, including women and enbys. I likely overuse the term from thinking I would be a skater after playing Tony hawk's pro skater and being into hiking/climbing/camping culture, but is this a universal thing among trans people you know?
Not defending the other person, libs very often hide behind the argument once called out, and I'd never call you "dude," or pretty much anyone not my direct friend, but I just wanna make sure I'm not hurting people unnecessarily without knowing it. Maybe it's the "being friends" part that makes the difference, and I hope so. Otherwise I got some trans-comrades to apologize to
Adding here after thinking more, I guess I usually use it to refer to a non-specific thing, like saying "ah dude, that's cool" and shit like that. Like saying "oh man." Is this related??? Need some help here lol
Real talk from a very trans-supportive communist: is this universal?
I find it to be at least extremely common, both in English-speaking spaces online and in German-speaking trans communities online and IRL (i'm German). Ultimately it's a matter of preference, there will be trans people who disagree, but there definitely are a lot of us who take offense. Same goes for terms like guy and especially for bro / bruh etc., or for German terms like Typ or Alter (in this context roughly comparable to guy or dude) which are generally at least masc-leaning. I'd definitely take offense to all of these, but sure, there are exceptions.
Still, these are exceptions, and more importantly, what we see here is a perfect example of how not to deal with such a situation: When somebody calls you out on misgendering, the only sensible response is to edit the post in question and to apologize. If you do that, it's normally no big deal, everybody moves on with their day. And it takes a few seconds to edit a post and a few more to reply "sorry, i've edited this" while it can quickly take hours to start an argument over this. Yet i see over and over again that liberals in particular are incapable of showing that amount of basic human decency. Instead, they have to assert their privilege to define what we're allowed to find offensive, talk down to us and act as if they're the one ones who've been hurt because we've called their feeling of superiority and infallibility into doubt by saying they've made a mistake. That's where it gets transphobic even if the misgendering was unintentional, that's where it gets patronizing as well.
Fully agree with the description. Fuck that lib. Keep tearing them apart til they apologize and edit.
In Dutch-speaking communities i still hear the American phrases a lot, but the equivalents in dutch rarely. But in international groups oriented towards my hobbies, dude is still used a good bit. But I'll just stay alert, just wanted to hear a bit more from a trans-comrade who most definitely would speak frankly to me (I understand that in-person call-outs can sometimes be difficult for such "small" things). Gonna only use it as a phrase of exclamation among friends that know me well I think and continue checking up regularly on my comrades.
Just to be clear, i'm not saying "don't say dude", the term in itself is perfectly fine. Just saying it's not unusual at all that trans people find it not to be gender neutral and particularly that the response in that case shouldn't be to start an argument where you assert a right to label trans people in ways that have clearly and already hurt them. It's the latter that made me go from "oof, that person should edit this post" to "scratch a liberal and a fascist bleeds".
Removed by mod
I live in the US and disparage it all day. That's productive.
Removed by mod
Go fucking fuck yourself you fucking piece of shit. Talking about other people's sOcIaL uNdeRsTandIng while you're fucking misgendering people AND JUSTIFYING IT AS IF YOU'RE A FUCKING VICTIM once you're called on it. You're rancid scum and I hope we get fucking defederated so we don't have to deal with filth like you.
My lack of social understanding? Gender neutral?
I have to smash through the wall like Hbomberguy right now
Do you go around telling other people that you fuck dudes? What do other people assume you mean when you say that you fuck dudes?
You could have just been like "Yeah you're right, sorry I didn't mean to misgender you." but instead you doubled down on being a transphobic dickhead and literally proved my point about liberals being shitbags in the process.
deleted by creator
No, it wouldn't be a problem if he said he fucked dudes. The implication though is that "dudes" is a gendered term. The complaint is that she was misgendered by someone who then doubled down on the misgendering. Her statement was not homophobic.
deleted by creator
The only argument she's making is that dudes is a gendered term, and him doubling down after the fact is bullshit
deleted by creator
In my experience, sexual inferences are the fastest way to educate someone who doesn't see a word as being gendered, but I can see how what they said could be read as using gay sexual activity in a negative way to someone not reading this thread and skimmed over the rest of the text in that reply.
Playing dumb is used by bigots as a shield to continue their bigotry unimpeded. Not allowing any room for them to play dumb is the only way to reach those kind of people.
deleted by creator
What she is saying is that she is not a dude
deleted by creator
What they are conveying is that "dude" is clearly not a gender-neutral term, as a straight guy would agree that they "fuck people", weird as the phrasing is, but not that they "fuck dudes." It demonstrates that they themselves don't perceive the social understanding of the term "dude" as gender neutral, not that "fucking dudes" is bad. It could also be used to debate a lesbian by the same token.
deleted by creator
She literally has her pronouns in her display name mf, it's not that hard
Removed by mod
https://youtu.be/h2TL0GHSue0
Most of the users on Hexbear are American and a decent number of the remainder are Brits and Aussies. Our criticisms do not come from having never received the privilege of witnessing these countries being shit first-hand, as much as you might like to pretend it's only those dirty foreigners not understanding your national glory.
Removed by mod
So the foreigner part is self-evident, and I think the "second-world", "potato vodka," etc. covers the "dirty" pretty plainly. I don't know why I'm even saying this, because basically what I'm doing is just teaching you to dogwhistle more effectively, but on the other hand this post is on lemmy, so hopefully I'm helping to point this out to other people so they will be more aware of these things when you and your ilk take your next crack at it.
Removed by mod
You also call them troll farmers, but the racial coding just keeps finding its way in somehow. Funny, that.
Yeah, we get it, you're a paranoid national chauvinist on top of being a transphobic asshole, that was already obvious.
I don't know a single trans person that views dude as a gender neutral term, the only people spouting that nonsense are transphobic cis dudes like you who make up excuses to misgender and harass us. Go die in a house fire, reactionary cissie shit.
Real talk from a very trans-supportive communist: is this universal? I definitely grew up in a conservative environment but definitely was under the impression that I and the trans people I am close to all thought dude was a term of endearment when used amongst friends, including women and enbys. I likely overuse the term from thinking I would be a skater after playing Tony hawk's pro skater and being into hiking/climbing/camping culture, but is this a universal thing among trans people you know?
Not defending the other person, libs very often hide behind the argument once called out, and I'd never call you "dude," or pretty much anyone not my direct friend, but I just wanna make sure I'm not hurting people unnecessarily without knowing it. Maybe it's the "being friends" part that makes the difference, and I hope so. Otherwise I got some trans-comrades to apologize to
Adding here after thinking more, I guess I usually use it to refer to a non-specific thing, like saying "ah dude, that's cool" and shit like that. Like saying "oh man." Is this related??? Need some help here lol
I find it to be at least extremely common, both in English-speaking spaces online and in German-speaking trans communities online and IRL (i'm German). Ultimately it's a matter of preference, there will be trans people who disagree, but there definitely are a lot of us who take offense. Same goes for terms like guy and especially for bro / bruh etc., or for German terms like Typ or Alter (in this context roughly comparable to guy or dude) which are generally at least masc-leaning. I'd definitely take offense to all of these, but sure, there are exceptions.
Still, these are exceptions, and more importantly, what we see here is a perfect example of how not to deal with such a situation: When somebody calls you out on misgendering, the only sensible response is to edit the post in question and to apologize. If you do that, it's normally no big deal, everybody moves on with their day. And it takes a few seconds to edit a post and a few more to reply "sorry, i've edited this" while it can quickly take hours to start an argument over this. Yet i see over and over again that liberals in particular are incapable of showing that amount of basic human decency. Instead, they have to assert their privilege to define what we're allowed to find offensive, talk down to us and act as if they're the one ones who've been hurt because we've called their feeling of superiority and infallibility into doubt by saying they've made a mistake. That's where it gets transphobic even if the misgendering was unintentional, that's where it gets patronizing as well.
Fully agree with the description. Fuck that lib. Keep tearing them apart til they apologize and edit.
In Dutch-speaking communities i still hear the American phrases a lot, but the equivalents in dutch rarely. But in international groups oriented towards my hobbies, dude is still used a good bit. But I'll just stay alert, just wanted to hear a bit more from a trans-comrade who most definitely would speak frankly to me (I understand that in-person call-outs can sometimes be difficult for such "small" things). Gonna only use it as a phrase of exclamation among friends that know me well I think and continue checking up regularly on my comrades.
Just to be clear, i'm not saying "don't say dude", the term in itself is perfectly fine. Just saying it's not unusual at all that trans people find it not to be gender neutral and particularly that the response in that case shouldn't be to start an argument where you assert a right to label trans people in ways that have clearly and already hurt them. It's the latter that made me go from "oof, that person should edit this post" to "scratch a liberal and a fascist bleeds".
Removed by mod
Yeah, people weren't aware of transphobic language 14 years ago, i know that, i've lived through that time.
"Dude" can be gender neutral but given the context of it in your response it really fucking looks like a microaggression against her for being trans