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The least believable part about this is boomers leaving behind money at all. If they're anything like the boomers I'm biologically related to, they brag about intending to "live it up" and "leave nothing behind but a beautiful corpse."
So then I told the old man "Sir, your card was declined", and he just fucking died right there on the spot with a huge grin on his face.
When I said I support the fake immigrants eating dogs, this is the dog I meant.
It figures they also wouldn't care enough to figure out that Thurston was in fact a Yorkie.