Love to see a bunch of shit I'm not qualified for and then a bunch of things that don't begin to cover my expenses and feel bad about myself and my circumstances and cry and eventually put one application for a custodian position with the county because what the fuck else will I do
I know if I went back to school and finished a degree it would give me a leg up but I just can't fucking handle the workload of work and school anymore, I feel like such a lazy piece of shit but I just don't have it in me anymore to keep this shit up
Dealing with a lot of dark thoughts today. Very dark.
I swear the process is designed to discipline labor. It's a weird hazing ritual we've normalized as part of making a living so you feel indebted to whoever hires you for ending the madness.
It kind of feels like the internet ruined it a bit. Jobs are so fucking competitive now, and posted so far and wide, that everyone is desperately jumping through hoops submitting white-hot applications. I can't just walk in an ask around, and get lucky. Why would they take a risk on me when they can send the job posting out to the most overqualified candidates in the area?
Corpo ghouls call this "churn" and it's intentional. They want everyone to be in precarious positions so they can be exploited for less.