Love to see a bunch of shit I'm not qualified for and then a bunch of things that don't begin to cover my expenses and feel bad about myself and my circumstances and cry and eventually put one application for a custodian position with the county because what the fuck else will I do
I know if I went back to school and finished a degree it would give me a leg up but I just can't fucking handle the workload of work and school anymore, I feel like such a lazy piece of shit but I just don't have it in me anymore to keep this shit up
Dealing with a lot of dark thoughts today. Very dark.
I had a couple stints where I sent literally hundreds of applications trying to get an entry level job with the state that I believe generally entail opening mail and never got a single response. I was told that you needed to call and ask about the applications so I made hundreds of calls and the people who answered generally sounded annoyed and would ask if I knew how many people were on a priority list. My bills are fortunately very manageable at the moment and I've been trying to make self employment work but I'm not sure I really have it in me with some undiagnosed auDHD going on. @Babs@hexbear.net made a post https://hexbear.net/post/3145128 a couple months ago about working at homeless shelters that I've been mulling over, but I've been dragging my feet in DMing her about it.