cross-posted from: https://discuss.online/post/12273255

I've only been on Lemmy a few days and I've already witnessed a lot of thinly veiled transphobia, anything from people dismissing the existence of trans people, to trying to claim we are predators. I've also seen people downvoted in the general communities for expressing trans support, or seemingly for no reason other than simply being openly trans or visibly queer. I know it's an ongoing effort to moderate transphobia on Lemmy, and the fediverse as a whole. We have to also address mentions of thinly veiled transphobia and transphobic users. Transphobia isn't just a differing opinion, it is a dangerous hateful sentiment which causes harm to vulnerable people and it needs to be addressed, at the instance and community level. We need to put in the effort to identify transphobic dogwhistles and language used by transphobes to eradicate this type of behavior from our communities and servers alike.

Some people will argue that the light stuff isn't something to worry about, but that's not true. This is a tactic they use to blend in with normies and make them think that nothing they are doing or saying is wrong. It's what transphobic right-wing YouTubers and Facebook users do to avoid being banned for hate speech. We are better than these corporations though, Fediverse is run by communities and for the users, we should not let these things slide as easily as Corporations do, they're in it to make money, we... We're in it to create a community for the users. Part of that means kicking out those who don't have all our best interests at heart.

    • Blazingtransfem98@discuss.online
      hexagon
      ·
      2 months ago

      I wish more instances would handle banning transphobes the way Hexbear does. No tolerance for Bigotry. Lemmy.world though seems to unfortunately be quite lenient about it ☹️

      • kristina [she/her]
        ·
        edit-2
        2 months ago

        the votes arent completely tallied yet, but since its relevant to this discussion, take a look at this one result from a survey. 266 trans people unanimously agree that hexbear is a transgender inclusive space.

        Show

      • Ulu-Mulu-no-die@lemm.ee
        ·
        2 months ago

        Lemmy.world was my first instance, it was a nice place while it was below 1k users, then it started to grow fast and removed until it's become a complete cesspool from all points of view, not just bigotry.

        I fled (I'm cis).

        • Blazingtransfem98@discuss.online
          hexagon
          ·
          2 months ago

          Lemmy.world sucks these days, their moderation is poor, and they seem to allow all kinds of bigots and trolls. Someone told me they believe strongly in freedom of speech, this is what it gets them.

          • Ulu-Mulu-no-die@lemm.ee
            ·
            2 months ago

            What I saw and the reason I fled was their "freedom of speech" only applied to things mods agreed with, that's no real freedom of speech in my book.

            While I didn't have any personal problem with them, I saw people and communities being banned for reasons that were not logical to me and I had the very strong impression their convoluted "explanations" were just a cover for their personal preferences, mind this is just my opinion.

            I'm fine with freedom of speech as long as it's coherent and not just based on what mods personally like or don't.

            I believe they do have the right to do what they want with "their" instance, I just don't want to be in a place like that.

  • Cowbee [he/him]@lemmy.ml
    ·
    edit-2
    2 months ago

    Hexbear is easily the most trans-positive instance, and it isn't close. Strictly anti-chaser, pro-trans, there's even a cis/trans questionaire that shows trans and trans-questioning members outnumber cis members when put together.

    Lemmy.ml's trans community has fantastic mods, but unfortunately Lemmy.ml itself isn't as protective of its trans users. I try to report transphobia when I see it, but I see a lot more transphobia on Lemmy.ml than I do on Hexbear.net, which is a symptom more of the userbase than the mods IMO.

  • TheOubliette@lemmy.ml
    ·
    2 months ago

    I'm sorry you've had to experience that transphobia on Lemmy. It is unfortunately common. And sometimes it even lurks as internalized transphobia in people that do not think of themselves as transphobjc. For example, there are Lemmy instances that actually promote chasers.

    I believe all instances if transphobia should be called out and obvious examples should result in bans. Sometimes it is good to let people have a chance to accept criticism and retract but I am biased towards more often banning. Comments that are transphobic should also be removed.

    • Blazingtransfem98@discuss.online
      hexagon
      ·
      2 months ago

      Most people who are transphobic know what they are doing, I'm certain the people I saw do. They're not going to change, they need to be given the boot to protect our communities from becoming Nazi bars.

      • TheOubliette@lemmy.ml
        ·
        2 months ago

        Oh yes, sorry if I implied giving these particular people a break. I was speaking more generally but miscommunicated. The people you mentioned should all be banned in my opinion.

  • فریدون حسینی@vegantheoryclub.org
    ·
    2 months ago

    The fediverse isn’t one thing and lemmy in particular is censorship proof, meaning there isn’t much you can do besides tailoring your own experience and filtering the feed to suit you. My instance doesn’t federate with lemmy.world or lemmy.ca because they are not well run instances without any oversight to their users and it’s mostly spam. My instance also fully disables downvotes because they are all spam as well.

    • Blazingtransfem98@discuss.online
      hexagon
      ·
      2 months ago

      Admins indeed can deal with these users, by deleting their content from their instances, and banning them from the site, if they are homed on that specific instance they get banned everywhere when that happens. So it can be dealt with but it takes work from our admins, and since these are communities run by real people and not monolithic corporations, we can speak up and make a difference. Reach out to these admins who are real people.

      • فریدون حسینی@vegantheoryclub.org
        ·
        2 months ago

        Admins can, I do on vegantheoryclub.org but lemmy.world and lemmy.ca will not. The admins don’t agree with your take and aren’t going to change their minds so the only recourse you actually have is to invest in and build your own server and federate with who you align with.

    • Zoift [he/him]
      ·
      2 months ago

      Wanting transphobes to fuck off isnt self-centered. Its avoiding the Nazi bar problem.

      • Blazingtransfem98@discuss.online
        hexagon
        ·
        2 months ago

        Agreed, this is a really bad take. I feel like this person is one of those people spreading thinly veiled transphobia and dogwhistles. That's what that is, claiming we are self-centered, too sensitive, slowflakes, triggered, etc. That's what they say to try and deny the legitimacy of our struggle, and the fact that in the end what we want is basic respect and recognition, they don't even want to do that.

    • Blazingtransfem98@discuss.online
      hexagon
      ·
      2 months ago

      You are extremely self centered in how you see the world. There are as many people in the world and in the fediverse that would say kick you out because you don’t have their best interests at heart.

      Wanting basic respect to not have my existence and rights debated or denied is not self-centered, kindly go fuck off if you think it is. If me being transgender and wanting basic respect, and not having my existence and identity denied doesn't "have their best interests at heart" they can fuck off, because they are nazis and bigots who don't have my or my minority brethren's best interests at heart. This isn't asking for special treatment, this is asking to not have my existence and identity denied. Something that cishet people take for granted.

      Folks this is an example of one of these dogwhistles I pointed out, trying to claim that wanting basic respect as a person and the way I identify is somehow self-centered. Fact is LGBTQ people just want to exist without prejudice or having their existence and validity debated, that isn't an unreasonable ask and yet there are people who will screetch and whine when simply being asked to show respect, not even told, asked.

    • blame [they/them]
      ·
      2 months ago

      Oh no not the foreigners.

      Anyway a better solution than tolerating the transphobes is to ban them. I have no idea what the fuck @curiosaurus@discuss.online is talking about. Sounds like shit.

      • UlyssesT
        ·
        edit-2
        18 days ago

        deleted by creator

    • Fidel_Cashflow@lemmy.ml
      ·
      edit-2
      2 months ago

      everyone here are transgender communists.

      Show

      Hexbear has the largest weekly trans megathread in the entire fediverse, a supermajority of non-cishet users, has hard-coded mandatory pronoun tags, and aggressively bans racism, bigotry and transphobia on sight. It is, hands down, the most trans-inclusive space in the fediverse, as evidenced by a recent user poll in which 90% of respondents agreed, Hexbear is a place that protects its trans users.

      Show

    • Blazingtransfem98@discuss.online
      hexagon
      ·
      2 months ago

      They may be aggressive in their methods but they are one of if not the most trans friendly servers in the fediverse. Mostly because they ban people for bigotry and apologists of transphobes. I mean you are a cis person, saying that a space is unfriendly to transphobes because they are a bit on the aggressive side and ban people for bigotry that is real but you don't see or understand why it is bigotry. It really isn't your place to tell us trans people that a space meant for trans people is unfriendly to trans people.

    • CindyTheSkull [she/her, comrade/them]
      ·
      edit-2
      2 months ago

      Outside of dedicated trans spaces made specifically for that sole purpose, Hexbear stands out as the most welcoming, inclusive, and protective community for trans people I've ever encountered online.