After surviving being stabbed, shot at, and fucking sexually assaulted I did what any normal person going thru multiple traumatic events does: I started to drink. I am so addicted to alcohol that I shake when I don't have it (I started drinking again a week and a half ago) and after ground scoring a bag of heroin, then smoking DMT at a punk show, I realized I need significant help. I've already been in talks with my ex over who can take care of our dog while I'm in rehab. I love y'all but I'm going dark for 3 or so months until I get in a recovery home. Leave the lights on for me. Imma try to nip this in the bud before I die and spend the next 24 hours absolutely spoiling my dog Basil, who I'm pretty sure I'll never see again after my ex-spouse picks him up. Imma buy him his fav treat: McDonald's fries and hold him and sob.
My ass in rehab is gonna ask the 3 times a week AA meetings how a higher power is willing to save us but lets white phosphorus rain down on innocent children in Gaza. Imma be loud AF.
Idk if this will help but I heard someone say that our god can be the highest version of our own self. That resonated with me.
If someones saying there's an omnipotent god that'd be reasonable of you to think
I've been leaning into Butler lately. "God is Change."