Sometimes I lie awake at night and wonder what I'm going to do in regards to my career. The thought induces so much anxiety that I can't actually think about it very long without being overwhelmed by the existential dread of the idea of having to do some menial task for the rest of my able-bodied life and wither away my remaining years in some underfunded nursing home as I die in my sleep from some undiagnosed illness.
But this... If this is what I have to do to "succeed" then holy fuck. I think staring down the barrel of a 12 Guage is a more preferable option or being that 'weird old guy' at the fucking uhhh grocery store check out lane or whatever. Goddamn this is some fucking horror show shit right here.
Sometimes I lie awake at night and wonder what I'm going to do in regards to my career. The thought induces so much anxiety that I can't actually think about it very long without being overwhelmed by the existential dread of the idea of having to do some menial task for the rest of my able-bodied life and wither away my remaining years in some underfunded nursing home as I die in my sleep from some undiagnosed illness.
But this... If this is what I have to do to "succeed" then holy fuck. I think staring down the barrel of a 12 Guage is a more preferable option or being that 'weird old guy' at the fucking uhhh grocery store check out lane or whatever. Goddamn this is some fucking horror show shit right here.
I feel this. I've dreaded it for a long time as well. I don't want to do menial work forever but I don't know what else to do.
I dream of one day moving out to some land and reforesting the ecosystem while I farm, and it's the one thing that keeps me sane