No job prospects. The work I do to support myself is come and go, and im probably gonna miss rent again. The older I get, the less friends it seems I have. None of my hobbies/passions excite me right now and just feel like a pain in the dick when I think about doing them. Every day is the same goddamn routine unless I go stay at my partners place.
It's cold and I hate going out in the cold, so that just compounds stuff further. Everything is dead outside. I'm tired, im always so tired. I can never get enough sleep no matter how much I actually get.
Feels like I'm just existing and I hate it.
yuuuuup
no partner, community, or job and no way to get any of those without immense suffering and even if i tortured myself to try there's no reason to expect success. it's like a slot machine but you get a bone broken every time you pull the lever and the prize is still suffering under capitalism and all the other social ills marginalizing us.
What a good way of putting it. That really is what it seems like.
me too, but it's vanishingly unlikely and i have no power or agency
Yeah, I know I'll probably be more myself tomorrow, but for now it just fucking sucks
We could do a zoom call with people here to hang out and chat? Community is community...
opsec concerns aside, i'm the wrong king of neurodivergent for that.
i have some online friends and i cherish them but they are not adequate and hug.jpeg is not
une pipea hug