how do you raise your kids so they don't turn into the next Pete Buttigieg?
Can’t speak for Buttigieg, but for a start, don’t be an obnoxious leftist.
I have met so many people in leftist circles over the past 30 years of my life as a leftist that are so arrogant, stubborn and obnoxious that I’m not surprised at all why infighting is so common among the left. Usually people who are obsessed with politics are kinda like that regardless of their political orientation, and they wonder why normal people stopped inviting them to parties. But in their minds, it only vindicated their superiority as someone who have read this or that political theory and can see the world better than anyone else! No one can understand me, you see.
And that’s people I’ve met in real life (used to be deep in organizing in a previous life until I burned out), and terminally online leftists are ten times worse than that lol.
Instead, be a good role model. Don’t even bring up politics at all. Let your kids discover that their cool mom/dad reads Marx. If they’re curious about it and have trust in their parent to give good guidance in matters they don’t understand yet, they’ll ask you about it.
I'm not shy at home about my political beliefs, I just find it much more useful to work with my kid on building a strong relationship than to browbeat her with the difference between labor and socially productive labor if she's taking too long to get out of bed, say.
I burned out on organizing a long time ago too but the same principles that got any org I was involved with any wins seem to work pretty well at home too. Maybe I effortpost about it sometime.
It might take a little bit but I'll try and make something coherent this week. If not something coherent then at least the nucleus of something useful.
My mom gave me a bunch of communist medals she had gotten from her party and didn't want anymore so I got to use them on my clothes. I was blinged out with lenin and che on my backpack. Worked pretty well.
There're different levels. Sure, maybe eating a potato chip is political, but it's not the same level of political as telling your child how to conduct themselves.
The way families are constructed is political. That I have effectively absolute authority over my children, however I choose to use that power, is absolutely political. Marginalized people live under the threat of having their children stolen from them because they lack the social capital to avoid getting ensnared in the family regulation system. That children have such limited rights to begin with is political. The power relations that exist between a parent and a child, and the structural context those relations exist in, is very much political.
Go to bed because you're tired and I know you don't feel tired but remember when you didn't realise you were hungry until you ate? it's like that and also there's not any fun stuff to do today anymore, I am also going to bed soon. The sooner you go to sleep the sooner it'll be tomorrow and the sooner we can go out to play and have fun. Also I love our bedtimes where I get to read you your night-time story and I've really been looking forward to it, so can we please go to bed so I can read you the goodnight story?
Yeah I know you don't feel like you're tired and I get it, but this is one of those times where I have to pull out the boring "adult card" and say that we usually go to bed around this time and that's because if we don't we'll be tired tomorrow. Then we'll just be really cranky and we'll end up fighting and I don't want to fight you, I'd rather have fun. Do you want to be cranky and fight?
Alright I will "go" to "bed" but I'll make sure you're fully aware of my displeasure with the situation the whole time. (will actually get really into, then fall asleep during the bedtime story)
Can’t speak for Buttigieg, but for a start, don’t be an obnoxious leftist.
I have met so many people in leftist circles over the past 30 years of my life as a leftist that are so arrogant, stubborn and obnoxious that I’m not surprised at all why infighting is so common among the left. Usually people who are obsessed with politics are kinda like that regardless of their political orientation, and they wonder why normal people stopped inviting them to parties. But in their minds, it only vindicated their superiority as someone who have read this or that political theory and can see the world better than anyone else! No one can understand me, you see.
And that’s people I’ve met in real life (used to be deep in organizing in a previous life until I burned out), and terminally online leftists are ten times worse than that lol.
Instead, be a good role model. Don’t even bring up politics at all. Let your kids discover that their cool mom/dad reads Marx. If they’re curious about it and have trust in their parent to give good guidance in matters they don’t understand yet, they’ll ask you about it.
I'm not shy at home about my political beliefs, I just find it much more useful to work with my kid on building a strong relationship than to browbeat her with the difference between labor and socially productive labor if she's taking too long to get out of bed, say.
I burned out on organizing a long time ago too but the same principles that got any org I was involved with any wins seem to work pretty well at home too. Maybe I effortpost about it sometime.
I would read that effort post
It might take a little bit but I'll try and make something coherent this week. If not something coherent then at least the nucleus of something useful.
please do
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My mom gave me a bunch of communist medals she had gotten from her party and didn't want anymore so I got to use them on my clothes. I was blinged out with lenin and che on my backpack. Worked pretty well.
Guidance is political
everything is politics
There're different levels. Sure, maybe eating a potato chip is political, but it's not the same level of political as telling your child how to conduct themselves.
Light Yagami is that you?
The way families are constructed is political. That I have effectively absolute authority over my children, however I choose to use that power, is absolutely political. Marginalized people live under the threat of having their children stolen from them because they lack the social capital to avoid getting ensnared in the family regulation system. That children have such limited rights to begin with is political. The power relations that exist between a parent and a child, and the structural context those relations exist in, is very much political.
The book Childism (Libgen link) broached the topic and is good reading.
On my reading list, thank you for the recommendation!
revisionism!
Bedtime struggle session when?
Go to bed because you're tired and I know you don't feel tired but remember when you didn't realise you were hungry until you ate? it's like that and also there's not any fun stuff to do today anymore, I am also going to bed soon. The sooner you go to sleep the sooner it'll be tomorrow and the sooner we can go out to play and have fun. Also I love our bedtimes where I get to read you your night-time story and I've really been looking forward to it, so can we please go to bed so I can read you the goodnight story?
The rules-lawyering 4 year old in me has no genuine objections to this, guess it's bedtime!
Have you considered that I don't wanna?
Yeah I know you don't feel like you're tired and I get it, but this is one of those times where I have to pull out the boring "adult card" and say that we usually go to bed around this time and that's because if we don't we'll be tired tomorrow. Then we'll just be really cranky and we'll end up fighting and I don't want to fight you, I'd rather have fun. Do you want to be cranky and fight?
Alright I will "go" to "bed" but I'll make sure you're fully aware of my displeasure with the situation the whole time. (will actually get really into, then fall asleep during the bedtime story)
fell for the classic blunder