Make it so the first sub rule prohibits the use of any "Teslurs".
Take anything critical of Tesla and either turn it into the most saccharine praise of Tesla or play directly into the Tesla owner exceptionality/victimhood complex, e.g.:
Even nature itself recognises how cool Teslas are. I don't see any racoons trying to break into your F-150, Darren.
Watch the Tesla owners as they are baffled and slightly unnerved by the sub, unsure as to whether they're part of a cargono-go cult or if the whole sub is collectively mocking them because the lines are too blurry to make out what's actually going on in there.
Send Elon's main account a moderator invite so he is definitely aware of the sub. Know that Elon Musk's weird ageplay alt is a subscriber and that he seethes with rage knowing about the sub's existence.
r/Teslabrokedownbutstilllovethecar
r/StillLoveTheCar is available
Shhhh no, don't! You're trying to tempt me into making a
account, aren't you?
This was your idea!
"People complain about Tesla reliability but I think of breakdowns as mandatory downtime maintenance which ultimately saves us on mileage, which only increases resale value. Think of how much better the environment would be if ICErs were as considerate of the environment as us Tesla drivers are!"