When i was a child, i believed autopilot really worked like in the movie Airplane, that it was an inflatable dummy.
When adults said things like "In this day and age, nobody says please and thankyou any more", I misinterpreted "this day and age" as "The Stayan Age", which was our current age, which obviously followed on from Bronze Age, Iron Age etc.
That adults had it figured out.
That average people actually care about anything but themselves.
That there is justice in the world.
Most humans have good ethics and beliefs. The more I grow, the more I'm disappointed in our society.
When I was little, I thought that "cash back" meant that the clerk literally just handed you money out of the register if you wanted it.
I assumed that most people were honest and only took the cash if they needed it. I didn't know that it came out of your checking account lol.
That a blowjob involved the act of physically blowing air on the penis. When I found out it actually involved sucking, I was like, "Oooh...yeah that sounds much more pleasurable."
I scraped my knee and thought that putting skin-coloured paint on it would heal it
Two that come to mind:
People would say that's an "old timey" car or something and I thought that was a brand name.
I thought the people who had really tall spiky mohawks had hair that just grew like that.
I thought every song on the radio was being performed live somewhere
Americans/Canadians made out while they undressed before sex, like in the movies. English people calmly undressed in front of each other and then began having sex in a dispassionate and business-like fashion. I think some other kid heard an adult say it as a joke then passed it on as a learned truth.
I thought that the Michelin tire company was headquartered in Michigan, USA and not France. In my defense, most of the US auto industry is based in Michigan, and they sound similar.
Also: I will never accept the "fact" that the Michelin Man is named "Bibendum"
When I was a young lad I thought milk was cow pee and was super confused by the world.
I thought our eyes worked by projecting some kind of energy beam that scanned objects, like how Superman's X-ray vision is sometimes drawn.
I remember believing this as well but specifically you had to kiss in a bed.
It's actually surprising how many people have believed this.
