I’d say it’s more of an identity descriptor than just a descriptor of a given relationship though probably not on level with a more standard identity descriptor like orientation (but it’s all constructed on material conditions so who cares? It’ll all change eventually anyway). I like to think of it like being bi, just because I’m currently with a hetero partner doesn’t mean I’ve lost my interest in homosexual partners or relationships. I’m just not pursuing them in that present moment. Similarly once you’ve made the jump to poly and realize it’s something you have interest in and would enjoy pursuing the thought of it is something you’ll be bringing into any relationship you’re in even if you’re not actively pursuing polyamory at that time. I guess it’s less an identity marker and more about being someone with the personality type that would be open to/want it. So now I’ve gone full circle and it’s just a preference again but what are most identity markers except preferences that are highly stigmatized and made socially rigid in your ability to pursue them?

Sorry I don’t get to talk about this stuff often