It sound to me you’re just anxious about sex and sexuality. Which is fine, sex is weird and scary, if anything being a little anxious over it is a healthy thing.

But I would suggest you talk to someone about this. If you decide you want to be celibate that’s fine, but if doing so is this much of a struggle for you I don’t think it’ll make you happy. You probably need to talk to someone and figure out why you feel so anxious about it.