"nt's see explanations as deflection, which like to a degree it is (because rejection hurts) but you or me would see it as communicating that we're not going to continue the harm further bringing up the point is seen by them as you "fighting" or "avoiding accountability" which they then feel a need to counter"
RSD fucking sucks because I literally CANNOT HELP the urge to explain its pathological and I don't think I can cope with this it involves controlling my instinctive behavior in ways I don't think I can manage to actually do. I am totally fucked this world will never have room for me in it I am so upset.
They think explaining is making excuses for your actions, when really it's you articulating that you understand what the problem was and will correct for it, and just want them to know that you know
I fucking hate that. Like there is logic behind everything i do, maybe its not always the best logic but if people would let me explain they'd realize I don't do shit because I'm thoughtless or dumb, my brain just takes different logical pathways.
I'm neurodivergent too and I don't know what to tell you, except you aren't alone and just hang in there.
Oh, I'm coming at this from a different angle but sounds like the same phenomenon. I'll be trying to explain reasoning/perspective and information I had to try to identity what went wrong with something or figure out if I made a mistake or there was miscommunication etc. and people make it an argument when I'm not trying to blame anyone or make excuses.
Regardless of who is "at fault" I'm trying to figure out what happened to learn from mistakes or help others learn, not blame or berate anyone. Unfortunately some people think everything is either apersonal attack or you are trying to avoid responsibility.
