like.. even most irl leftists don't seem to support us, especially outside of america. my dad's a borderline fascist, my mom's an alcoholic, my friends will most likely stop talking to me out of shame, dating is fucking impossible when trans.
why live
If your friends stop talking to you then those aren't your friends. I can't imagine how hard dating must be, it's extremely difficult even for me and I'm a cishet dude. I won't pretend our situations are even remotely the same, but I will tell you some things I've learned after going through some really long, really lonely periods where my self worth was basically nothing and I asked myself that same question, why live?
You have to really befriend yourself. Get to know yourself as well as you can and love that person dearly. If there are things you want to and can change, make an effort, but don't beat yourself up if you fail. Just keep trying and pushing forward. Find little things that make you happy, I got way into cooking and making music. Give yourself something small every day to look forward to, even if it's something dumb like a candy bar or watching an episode of something. Just take care of yourself.
I guess what I'm saying is you can't let other people answer "why live?" for you. You have to find your own reasons and live for them. I promise if you keep trying to make connections you eventually will, but you have to start connecting with yourself first.
In the meantime, we have your back.