Joe Biden boisterously announced 'Only I have the brains to rule Lylat!' and later: 'If I go down I'm taking you with me!'

...actually, his brain being shot repeatedly by lasers and bombs does fit the observed data

Letsa Go!

Maybe one of my more controversial opinions, but these sorts of products should really be classed as drugs since they are entirely focused on producing dopamine release without any nutritional value. Like, other than legal/employment issues, you are way better off using cannabis than eating any of these things

"Damn, those terrorists are getting more sophisticated all the time! Now their drones can mimic the exact signature of our F-18s!"

"We are basically condemned to unlimited climate change. But we can confidently predict plenty of treats-"

'Muricans:

"For the dog :)"

'Muricans:

How Elon thinks he looks:

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How Elon actually looks:

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Guessing that ellipses is replacing something like "to not allow us"

Damn, I should have read the other comments before I posted. Same joke, but perfect for this context:

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Uncanny:

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For those fortunate enough not to know, this is Bowser from the 90's Mario brothers movie

I watched it for the first time last night and it seems to hold up well enough to serve its purpose, at least in the broad strokes of "for profit healthcare/insurance is bad". Probably not a whole lot of new/surprising information for people who hang out here, but could be useful to share with anyone who is still afraid of/opposed to socialized medicine.

There are a few ironic bits from the UK talking about how people wouldn't tolerate reductions to the NHS. And they rightfully shit on Kaiser Permanente a bit, which I thought was funny since they are the lowest claim denial rate on that chart that's been circulating recently, so yeah...

The Ol' Democrat Trifecta:

1. Wastes public resources
2. To do something that will not help the situation at all
3. That will alienate the vast majority of their voting base for the supposed benefit of like 100 rich assholes

Maybe season tickets to the San Diego Padres?

Comrades, it has been a privilege posting with you today

Hooters but it's trying to retain relevance to its boomer demographic and it's called Hoot Hearse

I like 'irrationally rational' for people who will use sophistry and bad-faith use of statistics to lie to themselves/others

Our hypothesis is that, since nothing else could be changing ice levels, the water must simply be too lazy to turn into ice. So, as managers, our role is to make up irrelevant procedures to motivate/force the water to do what we want regardless of any concern from other disciplines like "ethics" or "physics".

Another entry for the libtionary

Civilization N. The state of being in which the proletariat accepts unlimited class warfare from the bourgeoisie without complaint

"Take us to your leader!"

"Ha ha, good one Earthlings! But now, really, take us to your leader."

"Okay, you know what?"