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But seriously, is anyone else tired of "man trapped in a woman's body"//"born this way" rhetoric? It feels like you're already bargaining from a standpoint of "theres nothing I could do about this, but if I could...."
i mean shit, i think i remember :pete: being asked a question about whether he'd take a shot that "cured gayness" and he said yes with his husband in the audience.
Yeah I've always hated that rhetoric because it's never mattered and at best it opens the door for "ok well you could choose not to act on it then"
Like yeah you're right I could choose not to do something or other — I could choose not to present butch, I could choose not to kiss girls with tongue, i could choose not to love and appreciate and stan all women as a default — but I like doing those things so I'm gonna keep it up, and fuck anyone who tells me otherwise.
At the end of the day I sure as hell am choosing to be gay.
I guess the "born this way" rhetoric is helpful for like indoctrinated teens who are just starting to realize they're gay and knowing that's a Problem for their familial and social circles, but it's definitely not great as a fully evolved queer adult
And yeah, it's like at a certain point I didnt choose my feelings, but I definitely chose to be this loudly and proudly queer, and present in a way that (I'm hoping) makes people question their schemas around gender.
Proud butch lesbian btw
:rosa-salute: :flag-lesbian-pride:
oh mood, every time someone waffles between sir and ma'am or defaults to using they/them when addressing me, I feel like I'm inching society towards gender abolition entirely :sicko-hippie:
Oh yeah I view it as a necessary dialectic phase of the discourse, but I think it's time for us as a culture to move past it, and I definitely wish more queers sort of matured out of that mindset. But so many get stuck at that stage.
It's ridiculous that the synthesis is just "respect people's personal autonomy regardless and stop giving a fuck" and we still haven't collectively gotten there yet
I always heard "born in the wrong body" and the like about being trans, same with "it's not a choice". This precludes the possibility of experimenting and questioning to find out what makes you happy because by definition those actions are choices, and the end result is you make a decision based on the results of your experimentation.
So, because I could repress myself, I thought that meant I couldn't be trans. If I was trans, I thought, then I shouldn't be able to bottle up all these feelings. Likewise, I had no fucking clue what being born in the wrong body meant. That's obviously some kind of dysphoria I don't have, but since that's all I ever heard "makes you trans", once again I thought I couldn't be trans because how the fuck should I know what another body is like (spoiler, crossdressing helped me simulate what a better body might be like).
Anyways this is all to say I'm right behind everyone here talking about the choices they made; it wasn't my choice to be "born this way" and I'm not a fan of feeling sorry that I was. It sure as as hell was my choice to come out though and I'm never backing down on that.