I find it difficult to classify myself as trans. I participate in trans communities, distribute violently queer literature, and am very gay, but I don't identify on a personal level with the experiences of trans people "figuring it out" or however you'd rather phrase it. Many journeys contain themes of self-discovery, self-understanding; my interpretation of my experience has been one of active opposition to the concept of a fixed self or any sort of attachment of that self to the body. I intentionally position myself politically, philosophically, and intellectually against oppressive and external forces. My presentation is meant to serve as a wound on the face of Self-as-Society, to nullify and reject Truth-to-One's-Self. I consider queerness to be a radical current, and one that deserves room to get weird. So if your definition of transness is the W*stern medicalist definition, I'm probably not trans. If to be trans is to wrest narrative control of your life from the hands of the oppressor and become a person you choose to be, to one day be unburdened to a past (temporal, biological, what have you) which was forced upon you, to speak once and for all only for yourself without bending beneath the weight of a world which demands capitulation, categorization, and so on... that I can at least try for. The goal is to become nothing, to be ineffable, to reach beyond what is presented and take something that is only yours.