i have read this before and already agree, i am not claiming that it should be the oppressed's responsibility to teach, they obviously lack the resources and social position and excess effort. i am simply pointing out - the oppresors are not going to educate themselves. the people in power do everything they can to prevent that, their society is built to prevent that as much as possible. people's opinions are shaped by their material conditions, not 'what is obviously morally correct to me'.
That was arguably analagous to the oppressed 'educating' their oppressors. The landlords did not do it for them.
edit: in a more literal sense the party had to spend enormous effort educating people to build support, the peasants weren't magically more in tune with economics and politics than landlords. SOMEONE had to teach them.
I just like it when my partner is nice to me, and vice versa for them. I agree that the memes are pretty cringe, but I feel at that point it's more of a fetish thing anyway
If you can wipe your own ass the comment was explicitly not about you. What you’re describing is straight up abuse and I’m sorry anyone’s calling you names like that. I had a girlfriend while I was in college who called me a p*ssy and told me to man up whenever I didn’t do exactly what she wanted. Shouldn’t have stayed as long as I did. It was real bad
And where is the border? No one explicitly expects women to be a mother figure to them, no one is conscious about it (okay the people who the post is about are and fuck them but i don't think they are a majority). Most men are happy that they can get rid of the yield of toxic masculinity and be open about their feelings .
I think it’s normal to lean on your partner emotionally and that give and take will build trust over time, but a lot of men are taking a lot more than they’re giving in terms of emotional support because they’ve been coddled for so long. If you never express your feelings you never have to process them, so a lot of guys will learn to talk about their feelings, but they’re about as emotionally intelligent as they were in 6th grade.
There’s plenty of other “mommy-girlfriend” stuff. Like there’s a learned helplessness that a lot of men do where they purposefully don’t try at chores to annoy their partner into doing it for them. Or like they’ll be in their mid 20’s and still not know how to cook, so their partner cooks the majority of the time (I personally washed all the dishes for every meal for years as a trade off for this, but being able to swap jobs sometimes is so much nicer)
Okay that makes it kind of clearer but i think we're dealing with two issues here.
One is the emotional blindness which most men are conditioned in by patriarchy. When i wanted to talk to my best friend about being autistic he simply laughed it off first. I didn't really know who to talk to in this case, i've been living among dudes since i was 14 so every message i got was that i gotta suppress that shit and so was everyone i lived with. It took years of self reflection for me to wade through all that shit but what started me off was that there was someone i could be open with my feelings about and someone who was willing to "wipe my ass" in that regards.
The other is the physical needs which i don't even really have a hold of. I haven't been living at home since i was 14 so i've learned to take care of myself in that regard fairly quickly and i didn't experience in my friend circles that it was so fucked up with other young men or haven't really thought about it but now that you say it it is indeed a problem.
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Yeah, this will forever remain an unreachable fantasy for them. When I still dated guys, nothing made me ghost them faster
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Hell yeah 😎 Agreed!
And fwiw, I don't really ghost unless I'm dealing with some creep shit. I sure was pushed to that often back then
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I can wipe my own ass I just wanted someone who wouldn't tell me I was a useless removed for feeling sad
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something something leftist memes
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:squidward-chill: :wall-talk:
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i have read this before and already agree, i am not claiming that it should be the oppressed's responsibility to teach, they obviously lack the resources and social position and excess effort. i am simply pointing out - the oppresors are not going to educate themselves. the people in power do everything they can to prevent that, their society is built to prevent that as much as possible. people's opinions are shaped by their material conditions, not 'what is obviously morally correct to me'.
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That was arguably analagous to the oppressed 'educating' their oppressors. The landlords did not do it for them.
edit: in a more literal sense the party had to spend enormous effort educating people to build support, the peasants weren't magically more in tune with economics and politics than landlords. SOMEONE had to teach them.
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+1 for Audre Lorde
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I just like it when my partner is nice to me, and vice versa for them. I agree that the memes are pretty cringe, but I feel at that point it's more of a fetish thing anyway
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I thought it was normal human behavior to not call someone a slur for feeling sad
If you can wipe your own ass the comment was explicitly not about you. What you’re describing is straight up abuse and I’m sorry anyone’s calling you names like that. I had a girlfriend while I was in college who called me a p*ssy and told me to man up whenever I didn’t do exactly what she wanted. Shouldn’t have stayed as long as I did. It was real bad
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And where is the border? No one explicitly expects women to be a mother figure to them, no one is conscious about it (okay the people who the post is about are and fuck them but i don't think they are a majority). Most men are happy that they can get rid of the yield of toxic masculinity and be open about their feelings .
I think it’s normal to lean on your partner emotionally and that give and take will build trust over time, but a lot of men are taking a lot more than they’re giving in terms of emotional support because they’ve been coddled for so long. If you never express your feelings you never have to process them, so a lot of guys will learn to talk about their feelings, but they’re about as emotionally intelligent as they were in 6th grade.
There’s plenty of other “mommy-girlfriend” stuff. Like there’s a learned helplessness that a lot of men do where they purposefully don’t try at chores to annoy their partner into doing it for them. Or like they’ll be in their mid 20’s and still not know how to cook, so their partner cooks the majority of the time (I personally washed all the dishes for every meal for years as a trade off for this, but being able to swap jobs sometimes is so much nicer)
Okay that makes it kind of clearer but i think we're dealing with two issues here.
One is the emotional blindness which most men are conditioned in by patriarchy. When i wanted to talk to my best friend about being autistic he simply laughed it off first. I didn't really know who to talk to in this case, i've been living among dudes since i was 14 so every message i got was that i gotta suppress that shit and so was everyone i lived with. It took years of self reflection for me to wade through all that shit but what started me off was that there was someone i could be open with my feelings about and someone who was willing to "wipe my ass" in that regards.
The other is the physical needs which i don't even really have a hold of. I haven't been living at home since i was 14 so i've learned to take care of myself in that regard fairly quickly and i didn't experience in my friend circles that it was so fucked up with other young men or haven't really thought about it but now that you say it it is indeed a problem.
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What if my flaw is compulsively quoting Stargate SG-1 at inappropriate times?
flaw?
Indeed.
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