Experiencing it now? Experienced it previously? Lived with and known intimately someone who has?

I was gonna post this in /c/womenby, but it's not very active, and I'm not solely interested in first-person perspectives anyway. Long-term partners or roommates, close friends, adult children - your experience is also valuable.

What do you know? What was it like? What resources are/were helpful? What did you/they do differently?

My period started getting weird a few months ago, and just on a hunch I looked up symptoms of perimenopause and was shocked. Why didn't anyone tell me all this weird shit was going to happen?!

I'm going into day 9 of a period that has steadily escalated in flow the whole time and wondering at what point I need to seek medical attention. I've definitely bled heavier than this in periods past, so maybe not yet??? But also, I haven't bled this many consecutive days since that whackadoo post-birth period, so I am kinda starting to wonder if this is getting sketchy?? But I found threads on Reddit and Quora of people talking about bleeding to some degree Every Fucking Day for Years.

What the actual fuck?

It seems like it's a total crapshoot whether an OB-GYN has much depth of knowledge about any particular issue, as it is with every specialty, and it's super common to have serious symptoms dismissed because Time is Money and Women Stay Whining or whatever. Also, in keeping with the traditions of my AuDHD people, I don't feel great about going into a medical appointment without a Stack of Evidence.

So! Obviously I've been searching and digging around, but I'm super interested in your information, stories, and perspectives. What is/was it like for you or your loved one? What changed? (or "What didn't change?" if that's a shorter list 😂) What did you/they do about any/all of it?

Jfc. I was about to be like, "And why the fuck doesn't anyone tell us?!?!" and then I remembered how terrible most women's health stuff is and yeah, of course there is no support system for this, let alone proactive education. And why would the older women around me want to ruin my good time? "Oh, it's all fun and boobs now, but someday you'll somehow be simultaneously bloody and dry, your skin will be horrific, your body temperature will never make sense or be homogeneous ever again, and you will be allergic to everything."

I saw some comments saying they made it through 1-8 years of this and have become their No Fucks Crone Life Best Self, and so I'm holding out hope for that. Any delightful little feathers you want to put on that end of the scale will be celebrated, but I will also be very grateful for your thorny, muddy truths. Lay it on me. Please. ❤️