Kinda stuck me cause I almost never hear men talk that way. In 30 years I don't think I've told my best friend I love him more then twice. Hell I even have anxiety using heart emojis. It's honestly really encouraging to hear men talk this way, maybe some day I'll be able to be one of them.

  • DickFuckarelli [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    I tell my shithead chud brother I love him on the phone because it forces him to have feelings and say it back.

  • s0ciety [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    It's both cool and good to normalize telling buds how you feel. I tell my friends I love them all the time. Definitely been doing it more since pandemic life started.

    Once you break the ice with it, it becomes more and more easy to do it.

  • deadbergeron [he/him,they/them]
    ·
    3 years ago

    when I was in college, I had a group chat with my high school friends, and whenever one of us would get drunk we'd post on there "yo im so drunk rn i love you guys so much." This gradually evolved into an irony-laden "guys I'm not even drunk rn but i really love you guys," to an unironic "I love you guys and I'm glad we're all friends." It was really nice, and a nice evolution from being unable to share emotions to being able to say I love you to another straight male

  • Wmill [they/them]
    ·
    3 years ago

    :meow-hug: I sometimes wish I could be as expressive with my emotions like I am drunk tbh one day I hope I can shake of the stoic mask without alcohol.

    • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
      ·
      3 years ago

      Om really glad it's normal in my group of friends. We're crusty punks and at least in this town the dirty punks can be tuff disrockers and still say they love a homie. Plus like, everyone is at least kinda bi. And we're the crasher crust 1000 stud count spiky hair dudes. The more explicitly queer punks are pretty much a citywide polycule. It's a small city with a strong DIY scene so being open about living the homies is normal. Basically anything that would get you banned here would lose you a lot of friends with the crowds I hang with, unless you have drugs or play in a cool band.

      • Wmill [they/them]
        ·
        3 years ago

        Even with my irl friend group it was only me who was emotionally constipated tbh one day I'll get there I think.

        • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
          ·
          3 years ago

          Most larger towns have what a friend described as "Too PC for the drunk punks, too drunk for the PC punks. I'm pretty sure they used to call them punks". How much of the local scene they occupy can vary greatly but the punks that actually do stuff like putnshows together, bring in touring bands and work with the general network of things are good people on the whole. You have to be able to handle some of the most aggressive and violent assholes ever on occassion but the good kids are some of the kindest people you'll ever meet.

          • s0ciety [he/him]
            ·
            3 years ago

            Oh, well aware. The last scene I was involved in was super small.

            Currently it's a lot of being lost in the crowd and age-wise, on the older side so all I know where shows are is bars, which is a bummer at times

            • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
              ·
              3 years ago

              We have a DIY multi purpose space down. It's pretty fantastic and it's owned outright by a radical org. Most punks are still late 20s or older here though. There's been a little uptick in new kids but it's still an older crowd.

              • s0ciety [he/him]
                ·
                3 years ago

                Yeah, most punks I've met lately are in that ballpark. Me in my mid-30s always feels like the old guy at shows lol

                All I want is to do is play basement shows and hang out with rad people

                • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
                  ·
                  3 years ago

                  I'm 30 and that's about median age around here. Kids will come check out shows at random here and there. We try to bring people in, but I totally get with the age difference it seeming weird to some. Also it's like, are we gonna ask kids if they wanna come hang out in a park and do drugs? I'm just trying to be a normal level bad influence not a creep right.

  • WhoaSlowDownMaurice [they/them, undecided]
    ·
    3 years ago

    :meow-hug: I struggle myself with expressing my emotions, not least because of autism. But I feel much love, a lot of it, for my friends and comrades. As robotic as that may sound, it's still true :soviet-heart:

    • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
      ·
      3 years ago

      Do it because you don't know when it might be the last time you see someone. Big part of why my friend group does so and we do group hugs at the end of a party or whatever is cause we all have a lot of dead friends.

  • Shrek
    ·
    edit-2
    3 years ago

    deleted by creator

  • GalaxyBrain [they/them]
    ·
    3 years ago

    Done with for all close friends for quite a while now. It's cool and good.

  • FunkyStuff [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    For me it's much easier to start expressing that by saying "much love" or another expression like that instead of "love you" directly since it's less loaded. Still the same feeling of course.

    • s0ciety [he/him]
      ·
      3 years ago

      Yeah, also starting off with goofier/sillier things like "love you, duder" helps a bit as well.

  • OldSoulHippie [he/him]
    ·
    3 years ago

    I'm 33 and I tell my best friend I love him from time to time. He's one of the only people I feel like I can say that to, "man to man" or whatever. My other friends that are men just kind of brush it off when I tell them stuff like that.

  • BigAssBlueBug [they/them]
    ·
    3 years ago

    I send blue heart emojis to my friends but only my partner gets the sparkling heart emoji

    • Ithorian [comrade/them, null/void]
      hexagon
      ·
      3 years ago

      I've started using :meow-hug: on this site cause it means a lot to me when people post that to the mental health whine threads I make. But like I said even that makes me feel kinda awkward.

      I got a ton of internal patriarchy to get over.

  • LoudMuffin [he/him]
    ·
    edit-2
    3 years ago

    that shit makes me uncomfortable lmao

    one of my friends used to come to school cooked out of her mind on robotussin and would tell me she loved me

    had another kid I was friends with as a child who was a foster child who told me loved me and he 100% meant it, i remember he gave me a little dandelion too and I didn't know how to react because I think I intuitively knew back then I was probably the only person who had ever not treated him like shit

    my dad also tells me loves me everyday and he knows I struggle with suicidal thoughts and it bums me out every time largely because I wish he didn't and also just the fact that he still does

    trauma dumping on chapo.chat sorry