A large issue here is that it's measurably easier to pity hard conservatives due to many of them appearing comically miserable in their hatred, which leaves frustration with a pervasive neoliberal attitude. This community itself directs most of its ire daily on the main page at "liberals being liberals".
While I don't think this shoots holes in your argument, what would you say to today's top story on Reddit where members are upset about Melania Trump renovating the White House garden? Her interior decoration and landscape changes are a symbolically important issue to them, whereas Joe Biden voting for the Patriot Act and the Iraq War... aren't, in their growing warmth for him. It sounds ridiculous to be angry at the attention this story got, doesn't it? But it took a few minutes out of my day and my peace of mind, because I saw it as another example of obsession with image over substance.
You can dismiss this as the Internet being the Internet -- that I'd benefit from logging off (which is also true) -- but I met these people all the time in America. I left my home country partly because of it. I worked at a newspaper that held a staff meeting about pursuing progressive stories but then refused to give a local BLM leader a platform because he had a criminal record and it would "look unsightly for our readers". When I argued that it was a classist approach I was met with blithe condescension, because I was being the unreasonable one after all. Shortly thereafter a co-worker spoke about getting more good photographs "from black neighborhoods" for the front page of the paper.
It's more difficult to find peace with moderate liberals because they are the ever-scolding gatekeepers, clucking their tongues and wringing their hands as they look down on you while effectually doing nothing.
Lately I've taken to saying that while people can be fundamentally decent, they can often possess technical knowledge while lacking structural awareness. Being kind interpersonally and being aware are not the same thing, which has lessened my disappointment somewhat. Still, finding my way out of this endless frustration has been a source of exhaustion for me over at least the past two years -- or at least a solution that hasn't involved closing myself off to people. Anymore when I meet someone new and I get a vibe from them that they value civility or image over morality, I try to bite my tongue and dismiss it. But they almost always manage to disappoint.
And then I also lapse into black moods where the majority of the people I've ever met in my life are worthless and I begin pouring energy into saying something that shocks them momentarily, even if it's the most randomly cruel thing I can think of to say that challenges their self-perception. Because that's the only difference you can see: one second where they're shocked and uncomfortable. When I left my job, my co-workers didn't say goodbye or wish me good luck.
A large part of my endeavors recently has been finding a way out of this mindset while not deluding myself into recognizing that they have any validity, because I know they don't.
tl;dr -- People are phonies and I hate that I can still identify with Holden Caulfield as a grown adult, because it wasn't supposed to be this way.
I don't really have any argument man. I just shared with Mencoh practices that have helped lessen my rage somewhat. I'm just as clueless as anyone else when it comes to trying to separate individuals from the horrific systems that they enable, my family members and relatives included.
About liberals being liberals, hardly anything can be done about that. This is another similarity between us and them: everyone is largely powerless against and overwhelmed by capitalism. Maybe deep down they believe that a better system is truly impossible. I know it's extremely infuriating to be told that again and again, but things are just as they are.
One important practice that has helped me tremendously and yet I forgot to mention yesterday in hurry: Yidam practice. Basically, instead of being angry about phonies, you fully embrace your own phoniness. I assumed an attitude of absolute pride and holy hell it actually worked to my surprise! In that mental state, I stopped getting angry at people being shitty and simply found them hilarious to the point of finding myself actually smirking at their bullshit. Their shittiness rolled off my mind just like water droplets rolling off a lotus leaf. I kept being like that for a few weeks but then decided to stop because I didn't want to become a psychopath. Moreover, being in that mental state helped me see the value of my usual vulnerable and empathetic self that I had tried to change. I think that experience really helped me to not take myself and my suffering too seriously. Warning: it worked for me but that doesn't mean it is guaranteed to work for you! I was living dangerously and didn't care about the clear warnings associated with this practice. Thinking back now, that was completely reckless.
a way out of this mindset while not deluding myself
I think you need the experience of being in a completely different mental state in order to dispel your doubts. Vipassana didn't work for me but maybe it will help you. Even psychedelics, if legal and available where you live, should be considered. Years ago I read about this old dude who had been a skeptic his whole life before he experienced a transcendental state after being fed a poisonous candy by a robber in Thailand. Good luck on your path!
A large issue here is that it's measurably easier to pity hard conservatives due to many of them appearing comically miserable in their hatred, which leaves frustration with a pervasive neoliberal attitude. This community itself directs most of its ire daily on the main page at "liberals being liberals".
While I don't think this shoots holes in your argument, what would you say to today's top story on Reddit where members are upset about Melania Trump renovating the White House garden? Her interior decoration and landscape changes are a symbolically important issue to them, whereas Joe Biden voting for the Patriot Act and the Iraq War... aren't, in their growing warmth for him. It sounds ridiculous to be angry at the attention this story got, doesn't it? But it took a few minutes out of my day and my peace of mind, because I saw it as another example of obsession with image over substance.
You can dismiss this as the Internet being the Internet -- that I'd benefit from logging off (which is also true) -- but I met these people all the time in America. I left my home country partly because of it. I worked at a newspaper that held a staff meeting about pursuing progressive stories but then refused to give a local BLM leader a platform because he had a criminal record and it would "look unsightly for our readers". When I argued that it was a classist approach I was met with blithe condescension, because I was being the unreasonable one after all. Shortly thereafter a co-worker spoke about getting more good photographs "from black neighborhoods" for the front page of the paper.
It's more difficult to find peace with moderate liberals because they are the ever-scolding gatekeepers, clucking their tongues and wringing their hands as they look down on you while effectually doing nothing.
Lately I've taken to saying that while people can be fundamentally decent, they can often possess technical knowledge while lacking structural awareness. Being kind interpersonally and being aware are not the same thing, which has lessened my disappointment somewhat. Still, finding my way out of this endless frustration has been a source of exhaustion for me over at least the past two years -- or at least a solution that hasn't involved closing myself off to people. Anymore when I meet someone new and I get a vibe from them that they value civility or image over morality, I try to bite my tongue and dismiss it. But they almost always manage to disappoint.
And then I also lapse into black moods where the majority of the people I've ever met in my life are worthless and I begin pouring energy into saying something that shocks them momentarily, even if it's the most randomly cruel thing I can think of to say that challenges their self-perception. Because that's the only difference you can see: one second where they're shocked and uncomfortable. When I left my job, my co-workers didn't say goodbye or wish me good luck.
A large part of my endeavors recently has been finding a way out of this mindset while not deluding myself into recognizing that they have any validity, because I know they don't.
tl;dr -- People are phonies and I hate that I can still identify with Holden Caulfield as a grown adult, because it wasn't supposed to be this way.
I don't really have any argument man. I just shared with Mencoh practices that have helped lessen my rage somewhat. I'm just as clueless as anyone else when it comes to trying to separate individuals from the horrific systems that they enable, my family members and relatives included.
About liberals being liberals, hardly anything can be done about that. This is another similarity between us and them: everyone is largely powerless against and overwhelmed by capitalism. Maybe deep down they believe that a better system is truly impossible. I know it's extremely infuriating to be told that again and again, but things are just as they are.
One important practice that has helped me tremendously and yet I forgot to mention yesterday in hurry: Yidam practice. Basically, instead of being angry about phonies, you fully embrace your own phoniness. I assumed an attitude of absolute pride and holy hell it actually worked to my surprise! In that mental state, I stopped getting angry at people being shitty and simply found them hilarious to the point of finding myself actually smirking at their bullshit. Their shittiness rolled off my mind just like water droplets rolling off a lotus leaf. I kept being like that for a few weeks but then decided to stop because I didn't want to become a psychopath. Moreover, being in that mental state helped me see the value of my usual vulnerable and empathetic self that I had tried to change. I think that experience really helped me to not take myself and my suffering too seriously.
Warning: it worked for me but that doesn't mean it is guaranteed to work for you! I was living dangerously and didn't care about the clear warnings associated with this practice. Thinking back now, that was completely reckless.
I think you need the experience of being in a completely different mental state in order to dispel your doubts. Vipassana didn't work for me but maybe it will help you. Even psychedelics, if legal and available where you live, should be considered. Years ago I read about this old dude who had been a skeptic his whole life before he experienced a transcendental state after being fed a poisonous candy by a robber in Thailand. Good luck on your path!