This is an even bigger red flag:

Like I was so excited that he thought of me in advance and it wasn’t a last minute Walmart gift

Apparently the husband putting any thought into her gift is an unusual occurrence. So much she calls this a "thoughtful gift"

Edit: Oh wow, scrolling down it sounds more and more like she is in a real abusive marriage... This is sad:

Had I opened [the gift] this morning I’d have gotten up taken my children and just left and maybe gone to a hotel for the day.

First he liked that I was attentive and caring something he Dosnt love so much now as he thinks I am ruining my children by not wanting to give out harsh punishments and believing they have a right to their own feelings and thoughts. I loved him because he was hard working honest and a good friend to me when I went through an awful divorce. He has some amazing qualities. He is just an egomaniac who was raised in a very different environment then how I was.

He works a full time job. He is the man. Has said that as we are married he will never wash a dish. He has pts pared maybe two meals in the several we have been together. They were sandwiches.

Well he deals with a lot of my short comings as well. I’m an awful house keeper and he was raised in a very tidy environment. And it drives him nuts. He is use to the women in his culture cooking three full meals a day with desert keeping a perfectly neat home and raising /home schooling the kids. I don’t do any of that. So he sees it as him also accommodating me.