I don't want to belittle your pain but a lot of us have had to endure earlier versions of ourselves fucking up good relationships, but have gone on to grow and become great partners even with mental illnesses.
My point is that the fact that you fucked up a relationship is not an essential part of you. Sounds like you made an irreconcilable mistake, but that doesn't mean you won't be a great partner to somebody eventually.
That sucks a lot comrade.
I don't want to belittle your pain but a lot of us have had to endure earlier versions of ourselves fucking up good relationships, but have gone on to grow and become great partners even with mental illnesses.
My point is that the fact that you fucked up a relationship is not an essential part of you. Sounds like you made an irreconcilable mistake, but that doesn't mean you won't be a great partner to somebody eventually.
every day i think about it a little less but it's been like 2 years now lol