'Because I've really got them over a barrel now. There's an official report that says I was stabbed by a Nazi assassin trying to kill them. They'd certainly look silly trying to court-martial me after that.' 'But, Yossarian!' Major Danby exclaimed. 'There's another official report that says you were stabbed by an innocent girl in the course of extensive black-market operations involving acts of sabotage and the sale of military secrets to the enemy.' Yossarian was taken back severely with surprise and disappointment. 'Another official report?' 'Yossarian, they can prepare as many official reports as they want and choose whichever ones they need on any given occasion. Didn't you know that?'