I just had someone try to tell me that “being a wife guy is toxic because it’s a red flag for codependency disorder”. Motherfuckers, you don’t need to do this. Once you’ve reached the point that I could recreate your takes with a Twitter madlibs book, you need to take a step back. You’re just playing word games. This doesn’t fucking mean anything other than an intent to emotionally inflame people. There is no underlying verifiable claim in that statement. I hate to get all new atheist and start citing fallacies, but goddamn this pushed me over the fucking line
i hate all this fucking academic and therapy talk being used in ways that render them completely useless and meaningless. my breaking point was "emotional labor" and now hearing that a loving relationship is actually codependency from the same people who create mancaves to get away from their wives that they hate and children they ignore has made me the joker
It would also help a lot if we were allowed to live in walkable communities and work for a reasonable amount of hours each week. It’s so much harder to upkeep friendships that I would have used for emotional support in the past because everyone’s so fucking busy and far away all the time
Right, and that's entirely true. Women also perform the majority of even thinking about that stuff, which I think is what "mental load" (:hyperflush: ) means.
But my "emotional labor" beef is that as an academic term, it meant the performative commodification of emotions that, if deemed performatively inadequately, might lead to the loss of wages. Hochschild talked about emotional labour as being sold for a wage and having exchange-value. But now it means like, being happy that your partner got a raise instead of you. Or like, that your kid entrusts you with their emotional vulnerability.
It sucks because it’s basically the result of a shitty mental health system breaking down. If people’s mental health was given proper supports and resources, there would be no need to go on TikTok and self-dx and use potentially inaccurate terminology or info. But as it stands, self dx is the safest route for some people. And the culture of blaming individual people and trying to find “fakers” doesn’t help at all.
And then there’s just general language decay and all the intersectional baggage that comes with it. In the same way that “woke” lost its racial connotations amongst white Twitter libs, “emotional labor” lost its gendered and its class connotations. It’s all spectacle
I'm always in awe of the way libs have managed to codify being annoying and demeaning in a way that makes them feel like an academic or something. Just be catty like a normal fucking person jesus christ.
It’s the spreading of influencer culture I swear. Everyone learns what types of people are aspirational based on what YouTube videos get recommended to them and just copy paste speaking patterns off of all their problematic faves
Its also a way to air your weird grievances in a pseudo-righteous way. Everyone's gotta have the moral high ground all the fucking time. Just say you hate wife-guys because they're soy or something, nobody gives a shit.
Yeah like if you're literally married maybe it's okay to depend on your spouse? Just a little?
Like half these twitter takes make me think the poster has never actually loved someone
Men are allowed to lust after women and woo them and make them laugh. But seeing a man truly admire and respect a woman makes a lot of people uncomfortable. They read it as weakness or something. Men are only supposed to respect and admire other men. It’s really fucked up and also I think the reason that so many cishet men won’t let themselves actually be vulnerable with their partners.
I just had someone try to tell me that “being a wife guy is toxic because it’s a red flag for codependency disorder”. Motherfuckers, you don’t need to do this. Once you’ve reached the point that I could recreate your takes with a Twitter madlibs book, you need to take a step back. You’re just playing word games. This doesn’t fucking mean anything other than an intent to emotionally inflame people. There is no underlying verifiable claim in that statement. I hate to get all new atheist and start citing fallacies, but goddamn this pushed me over the fucking line
i hate all this fucking academic and therapy talk being used in ways that render them completely useless and meaningless. my breaking point was "emotional labor" and now hearing that a loving relationship is actually codependency from the same people who create mancaves to get away from their wives that they hate and children they ignore has made me the joker
god that post was so infuriating. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP AND BE A PARENT YOU FUCKING CRETIN
deleted by creator
It would also help a lot if we were allowed to live in walkable communities and work for a reasonable amount of hours each week. It’s so much harder to upkeep friendships that I would have used for emotional support in the past because everyone’s so fucking busy and far away all the time
Right, and that's entirely true. Women also perform the majority of even thinking about that stuff, which I think is what "mental load" (:hyperflush: ) means.
But my "emotional labor" beef is that as an academic term, it meant the performative commodification of emotions that, if deemed performatively inadequately, might lead to the loss of wages. Hochschild talked about emotional labour as being sold for a wage and having exchange-value. But now it means like, being happy that your partner got a raise instead of you. Or like, that your kid entrusts you with their emotional vulnerability.
:marx-joker:
It sucks because it’s basically the result of a shitty mental health system breaking down. If people’s mental health was given proper supports and resources, there would be no need to go on TikTok and self-dx and use potentially inaccurate terminology or info. But as it stands, self dx is the safest route for some people. And the culture of blaming individual people and trying to find “fakers” doesn’t help at all.
And then there’s just general language decay and all the intersectional baggage that comes with it. In the same way that “woke” lost its racial connotations amongst white Twitter libs, “emotional labor” lost its gendered and its class connotations. It’s all spectacle
incredible statement grounded in grass
I'm always in awe of the way libs have managed to codify being annoying and demeaning in a way that makes them feel like an academic or something. Just be catty like a normal fucking person jesus christ.
It’s the spreading of influencer culture I swear. Everyone learns what types of people are aspirational based on what YouTube videos get recommended to them and just copy paste speaking patterns off of all their problematic faves
Its also a way to air your weird grievances in a pseudo-righteous way. Everyone's gotta have the moral high ground all the fucking time. Just say you hate wife-guys because they're soy or something, nobody gives a shit.
Some radical honesty would get people torn to shreds. Calling a guy weak for loving his wife would be way too self-aware
:jokerfication:
Yeah like if you're literally married maybe it's okay to depend on your spouse? Just a little?
Like half these twitter takes make me think the poster has never actually loved someone
I am a wife guy and i'm not ashamed of it!
Men are allowed to lust after women and woo them and make them laugh. But seeing a man truly admire and respect a woman makes a lot of people uncomfortable. They read it as weakness or something. Men are only supposed to respect and admire other men. It’s really fucked up and also I think the reason that so many cishet men won’t let themselves actually be vulnerable with their partners.
Sounds like someone's lonely and jealous lol.
Enjoy being married, and screw the jealous assholes.