Actually I do know who needs to hear it - people like this: https://twitter.com/kazweida/status/1521312672465051649
I know it's not the most important thing right now, but since the Roe v Wade news there have been a bunch of tweets encouraging men to get vasectomies, and/or trying to analogize between female birth control methods and vasectomies, that include some assertion to the effect of "you can just get it reversed later when you're ready for kids".
This is not true. Yes, the vasectomy reversal procedure exists but its success rate is not very good (70% at best), and the likelihood of restoring fertility only goes down as more time passes since the initial vasectomy. This is why urologists advise their patients to consider a vasectomy to be a permanent procedure.
I won't say much more about it, other than it would be nice if more forms of male birth control (e.g. Vasalgel) entered the market soon.
I don't want to make a claim of universality. I don't want to claim that there's an achievable balance that's for everyone. I am aware that there are experiences worse than death that millions of people regularly live through.
It feels wrong going into this as a person with no major traumas and no depression. It may be frustrating to see me, someone with the privilege of being a contented person, going on to say "happiness isn't everything." But the promise of happiness is itself a lie in many regards, from the "pursuit of happiness" to the pseudoscience of "positive" psychology.
I don't want to judge you or invalidate your suffering. You seem to be having a tough time with things. I do want to contend that, outside of either of our experiences, there is a drive towards furthering life that nonetheless survives despite its abysmal failures. Some lives are destroyed in the mix, some mice meet owls, some people are born with debilitating conditions. No single part of this natural order is redemptive, just, or resilient. But the whole mass of life tends to stick around, one generation at a time. To me, antinatalism concerns itself with the obvious failures of life, but offers no real alternative to it other than letting everything die out within a generation. It avoids or disgraces many of the other things that are tied to the experience of living, and often appears to be little more than a philosophical dead end that appeals to those who find themselves at dead ends.