Yeah it’s kind of the flip side of how straight guys will get fragile about being “gay” because they’re attracted to a trans woman. Their initial attraction is to the correct gender and then they put the wrong label on it because of whatever insecurities they have. Being attracted to an enby who identifies more masculine, but having that attraction be to perceived femininity is the opposite. Wrong gender, correct label.
And also gender is more complicated than a single spectrum. The more I dig the more gender seems like a series of islands with convoluted trade agreements.
Yeah that's a good point. Like there's a whole range of combination of non-binary identifications and presentations and sex traits I might find individually attractive(like a trans masc person with discernable breasts. I might like their chest but not be attracted to them) on a sliding scale, but it's ultimately body types that would be considered female and more feminine gender identities I consider attractive, so if I dated someone non-binary but trans fem with a feminine body type I'd probably just count that as spicy straight. IDK for sure though burn thag bridge if and when I get to it.
Yeah I think the point the important thing is you’re both on the same page about both the gendered attraction and the label. And ideally that’s something you can just kinda discuss and work out. I find that just knowing how someone identifies changes how I perceive them and am potentially attracted to them. But I also only experienced sexual attraction once before transitioning, so the whole attraction to individual body parts thing is a little foreign to me and a lot of this is more about romantic attraction. So idk
Yeah it’s kind of the flip side of how straight guys will get fragile about being “gay” because they’re attracted to a trans woman. Their initial attraction is to the correct gender and then they put the wrong label on it because of whatever insecurities they have. Being attracted to an enby who identifies more masculine, but having that attraction be to perceived femininity is the opposite. Wrong gender, correct label.
And also gender is more complicated than a single spectrum. The more I dig the more gender seems like a series of islands with convoluted trade agreements.
Yeah that's a good point. Like there's a whole range of combination of non-binary identifications and presentations and sex traits I might find individually attractive(like a trans masc person with discernable breasts. I might like their chest but not be attracted to them) on a sliding scale, but it's ultimately body types that would be considered female and more feminine gender identities I consider attractive, so if I dated someone non-binary but trans fem with a feminine body type I'd probably just count that as spicy straight. IDK for sure though burn thag bridge if and when I get to it.
Yeah I think the point the important thing is you’re both on the same page about both the gendered attraction and the label. And ideally that’s something you can just kinda discuss and work out. I find that just knowing how someone identifies changes how I perceive them and am potentially attracted to them. But I also only experienced sexual attraction once before transitioning, so the whole attraction to individual body parts thing is a little foreign to me and a lot of this is more about romantic attraction. So idk