Despite being a feminist, you seem to think that what women need is more people telling them what to do and think.
Literally when did I even comment on whether she should leave the relationship or not. This is not Reddit, you are not OP. Why would I?
I prefer a kind of feminism that involves listening to women, being supportive, and dealing with them on their own terms.
And this makes you unable to call out misogyny? Damn. Feminism is not when women and non binary folk do something. Your first comment wasn't feminist and none of your replies have been feminist. So where does this come from?
Whatever, no mention on why you said this dismissive cringe:
I do you wish you luck with continuing your apparently unbroken streak of never having reacted badly to anything or ever hurt anyone though.
But yeah sure, I "have no intention of engaging with (you) honestly" here.
"no mention on why you said this dismissive cringe"
Again, your dishonest argumentative tactics are not helpful. You are not responding to every line I have written but you expect me to do so for you. Hardly fair. But I will continue to generously humor you and explain that it was a blithe comment about how your attitude seems to indicate you've never had to forgive someone you love for anything serious, nor need such forgiveness for yourself. Otherwise I would expect you to be more understanding about how otherwise decent people can do shitty things. I am sorry if I offended you, though you betray yourself in hyper-focusing on the one thing I said that even could be interpreted as offensive, whereas you, on the other hand, have said a laundry list of far more offensive things to me that I have somehow managed to brush off.
"Literally when did I even comment on whether she should leave the relationship or not."
I'm hoping you're being disingenuous here. You have called her boyfriend a "misogynist" and a "bad person" whose problems go beyond "character flaws." Yet you are going to impossibly claim that you don't think she should leave him? If so you are being pedantic, as the only option you are leaving open is for her to choose to stay with someone she now knows to be a bad person and a misogynist. What kind of choice is that? Whether yours is literally one of them or not, the chorus of voices on reddit are only going to serve to shame her should she not illogically choose to continue her stable, long-term relationship.
"And this makes you unable to call out misogyny? Damn. Feminism is not when women and non binary folk do something. Your first comment wasn’t feminist and none of your replies have been feminist. So where does this come from?"
I barely can grasp at an understanding of what you are saying here. In the very first line of my reply I agreed with you that misogyny is playing a part here. I disagree with your labelling of him as a misogynist, and further don't understand how you believe it to be helpful to the conversation and what you hope to achieve by doing so.
Where does what come from?
I am sorry you don't consider me or my replies to be feminist, but don't worry, that was already clear from your wild accusations two posts ago. Fortunately for me you are not the pope of feminism. For my part I haven't found your replies to be particularly feminist either, though I don't know how simply stating that is helpful.
I'm not being disingenuous, I genuinely think that what I believe she should do doesn't matter. Because, this is not Reddit and you are not OP. I don't see it as pedantic.
I can only comment on the actions of a misogynist man who witnessed a traumatic event for his girlfriend and made it about his dick.
how you believe it to be helpful to the conversation and what you hope to achieve by doing so.
What conversation? You want to answer OP's post ("I want to keep my relationship") and I don't. I want to be more mindful of the way misogyny hurts women. Your original comment sounds dismissive of the way this is misogyny and sexual violence:
Sometimes you say shitty things that you really regret later, sometimes you’re not there for people you really love when they need you.
Forgive me for thinking it's an inappropriate response. So:
He got sent revenge porn and wasn’t able to focus on how traumatic that is for her. (…) I shouldn’t be surprised at rape culture and people (linked Reddit comment) ignoring women’s trauma for men’s comfort, but oh well.
Edit: why the fuck is this thread still going on. It has no substance.
"I genuinely think that what I believe she should do doesn’t matter. Because, this is not Reddit and you are not OP."
So if you're only judging her in your mind, and disagree with saying these things to her directly on reddit, then I don't even know why this entire page exists.
" why the fuck is this thread still going on. It has no substance."
I'm judging her bf and the redditor who commented. I don't judge victims and survivors.
and disagree with saying these things to her directly on reddit
I think getting her in contact with rpe and revenge porn survivors would be more helpful than excusing her bf. I would have commented that.
then I don’t even know why this entire page exists.
Well you see. A few months ago, a subreddit for a popular left-wing podcast was banned from reddit. This subreddit was called ChapoTrapHouse after the pod and was a place were leftists would post memes. The ban was meant to-
Literally when did I even comment on whether she should leave the relationship or not. This is not Reddit, you are not OP. Why would I?
And this makes you unable to call out misogyny? Damn. Feminism is not when women and non binary folk do something. Your first comment wasn't feminist and none of your replies have been feminist. So where does this come from?
Whatever, no mention on why you said this dismissive cringe:
But yeah sure, I "have no intention of engaging with (you) honestly" here.
Again, your dishonest argumentative tactics are not helpful. You are not responding to every line I have written but you expect me to do so for you. Hardly fair. But I will continue to generously humor you and explain that it was a blithe comment about how your attitude seems to indicate you've never had to forgive someone you love for anything serious, nor need such forgiveness for yourself. Otherwise I would expect you to be more understanding about how otherwise decent people can do shitty things. I am sorry if I offended you, though you betray yourself in hyper-focusing on the one thing I said that even could be interpreted as offensive, whereas you, on the other hand, have said a laundry list of far more offensive things to me that I have somehow managed to brush off.
I'm hoping you're being disingenuous here. You have called her boyfriend a "misogynist" and a "bad person" whose problems go beyond "character flaws." Yet you are going to impossibly claim that you don't think she should leave him? If so you are being pedantic, as the only option you are leaving open is for her to choose to stay with someone she now knows to be a bad person and a misogynist. What kind of choice is that? Whether yours is literally one of them or not, the chorus of voices on reddit are only going to serve to shame her should she not illogically choose to continue her stable, long-term relationship.
I barely can grasp at an understanding of what you are saying here. In the very first line of my reply I agreed with you that misogyny is playing a part here. I disagree with your labelling of him as a misogynist, and further don't understand how you believe it to be helpful to the conversation and what you hope to achieve by doing so.
Where does what come from?
I am sorry you don't consider me or my replies to be feminist, but don't worry, that was already clear from your wild accusations two posts ago. Fortunately for me you are not the pope of feminism. For my part I haven't found your replies to be particularly feminist either, though I don't know how simply stating that is helpful.
I'm not being disingenuous, I genuinely think that what I believe she should do doesn't matter. Because, this is not Reddit and you are not OP. I don't see it as pedantic.
I can only comment on the actions of a misogynist man who witnessed a traumatic event for his girlfriend and made it about his dick.
What conversation? You want to answer OP's post ("I want to keep my relationship") and I don't. I want to be more mindful of the way misogyny hurts women. Your original comment sounds dismissive of the way this is misogyny and sexual violence:
Forgive me for thinking it's an inappropriate response. So:
Edit: why the fuck is this thread still going on. It has no substance.
So if you're only judging her in your mind, and disagree with saying these things to her directly on reddit, then I don't even know why this entire page exists.
Fair.
I'm judging her bf and the redditor who commented. I don't judge victims and survivors.
I think getting her in contact with rpe and revenge porn survivors would be more helpful than excusing her bf. I would have commented that.
Well you see. A few months ago, a subreddit for a popular left-wing podcast was banned from reddit. This subreddit was called ChapoTrapHouse after the pod and was a place were leftists would post memes. The ban was meant to-
I mean this particular page rather than the whole website....
That's where I was getting at, smh.