He's dead to me. I switch rapidly between hoping his zombifying body dies ASAP, and missing the person he was before Nazis brainwashed and stole him.

He was a shitty friend who gatekept random things, like listening to bands in his mid-twenties. Much due to toxic masculinity. I found him quite cringey. Now he's a Nazi.

Yet I mourn his cringe ass each day. A whole person was lost to Nazis. I'm cycling, and I need new outlooks on this situation to get out of this rut. My self care is suffering.