• Abstraction [he/him]
    ·
    2 years ago

    The problem in the end is reification of gender, there is no real difference between the two except in terms of identity (which is valid). You are who you are, naming it is secondary.

    • Dirtbag [they/them]
      ·
      edit-2
      2 years ago

      Your comment is hella abstract, which makes sense considering your username. :thonk:

      I think I agree with you though? Labels are typically just shorthand descriptions for others, not instructions on who / what we have to be.

      One of the cool things about people is we even outgrow the labels used for us over time! The easiest example is around labels based on age, but for a lot of folx it can be based around gender or sexuality as well.

      There was a period of time where I was definitely a dude. That shifted as I experienced life and I’m nonbinary now. I love that I’ve had that experience and also that’s definitely not the same journey others have, I’m just a genderfluid dude who also isn’t a dude lol

    • infuziSporg [e/em/eir]
      ·
      2 years ago

      I'm not sold on this.

      Just because gender is nebulous doesn't mean it doesn't exist in a distinctive way. I don't think people would have gender dysphoria if it was sufficient to say "I'm going to be all the socially recognizable things that I already am, and just call it the other category".

      It makes a lot more sense to recognize that although most of the markers of gender are not fixed, there are correlations and clusters that we make in the blink of an eye in the process of assessing another person, and that the social construct of gender is built from these.

      • Awoo [she/her]
        ·
        2 years ago

        Just because gender is nebulous doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist in a distinctive way. I don’t think people would have gender dysphoria if it was sufficient to say “I’m going to be all the socially recognizable things that I already am, and just call it the other category”.

        I vaguely recall reading that desire to physically transition among kids with a proper support network declines massively. If that's true then I'm not really willing to dismiss this. It's plausible that desire to transition comes from desire to be accepted, recognised and affirmed as the gender we are and that genuinely being surrounded by that affirmation eliminates the feeling that there is a need to transition.

        Not saying that's all there is to it but I think we have a tonne of research that needs doing into this topic.

        • AcidSmiley [she/her]
          ·
          2 years ago

          Keep in mind that a) there's massive amounts of transphobic disinfo around gender affirming care for children, that b) not all trans people have or are aware of their dysphoria, that c) socially transitioning causes huge amounts of euphoria that wear off over time and that d) children still lack a huge part of the physical characteristics that cause dysphoria in the first place. From my personal experience, i'm absolutely not buying that idea, it is the exact opposite of what i experience. Almost everybody i interact with calls me by my real name and genders me correctly, but that doesn't change the fact that living in this skin is slowly, but surely killing me. I don't think i could handle this if i had socially triggered dysphoria on top of the physically triggered dysphoria. This is accutely life-threatenign for me and the idea that actual, pronounced dysphoria doesn't have to be met with gender-affirming care is something i view as actively genocidal against trans people.

          It's ofc important not to pathologize transness in itself and to stress there's much, much more to being trans than pain and suffering, that you do not need dysphoria to be valid etc., but downplaying dysphoria in total is simply a threat for trans healthcare.

          • Awoo [she/her]
            ·
            edit-2
            2 years ago

            Yuh but I'm pretty sure that was one I picked up from Mermaids. My memory of it is messy though it's been a while since I was deeply involved in this topic.

            I'm not invalidating you or that experience. I just think we know almost fuck all about this and really need to learn a lot more from very early care without the negative social hellscape playing a factor.