HoChiMaxh [he/him] to menby • 2 years ago

I am a normal, fit and generally happy man in a healthy and loving LTR with a secure job and a robust group of interesting friends AMA

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I am a normal, fit and generally happy man in a healthy and loving LTR with a secure job and a robust group of interesting friends AMA

HoChiMaxh [he/him] to menby • 2 years ago

IDK this whole men on this site need advice thing has convinced me that people here really think this isn't a safe place to ask questions about how to, IDK, be?. So ask them here I guess if you didn't ask them in the other thread.

I'm drunk and going to sleep now, but I have the day off tomorrow and will sincerely commit to effort-posting responses if anyone has genuine questions they want some in depth advice to.

I will say I'm just a guy who thinks he has enough trips around the sun to have some insight to share but I am not an authority on anything, so anyone else please feel free to chime in

Chat

AOCapitulator [they/them, she/her]
·
2 years ago
what is a lord of the rings secure job?

link
- SoyViking [he/him]
  ·
  2 years ago
  Being a hairdresser for the elves. They basically live forever and that long hair doesn't do itself.
  
  link
- FuckYourselfEndless [ze/hir]
  ·
  2 years ago
  Ringbearer
  
  link
- HoChiMaxh [he/him]
  hexagon
  ·
  2 years ago
  Drawbridge handler
  
  link
  - AOCapitulator [they/them, she/her]
    ·
    2 years ago
    thats not secure at all! We only see like two of them and I'm pretty sure both die like right away
    
    link

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A space for masculine folks to talk about living under patriarchy.

Detoxing masculinity since 1990!

You don’t get points for feminism, feminism is expected.

Guidelines:

Questions over blame
Humility over pride
Wisdom over dogma
Actions over image

Rules (expansions on the guidelines):

Mistakes should be learning experiences when possible.
- Do not attack comrades displaying vulnerability for what they acknowledge are mistakes.
- If you see good-faith behavior that's toxic, do your best to explain why it's toxic.
- If you don't have the energy to engage, report and move on.
- This includes past mistakes. If you've overcome extreme reactionary behavior, we'd love to know how.
- A widened range of acceptable discussion means a greater need for sensitivity and patience for your comrades.
- Examples:
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  - "I know that {reality}, but I feel like {toxicity}"
  - "I don't understand why this is reactionary, but it feels like it {spoilered details}"
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- Constantly info-dumping and letting us sort through your psyche is not healthy for any of us.
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No singular masculine ideal.
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- This also includes tendency struggle-sessions.
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- Post the picture of the fish you caught in !sports (feminine people like fish too smdh my damn head).
- At best, stuff like this is off-topic. At worst, it's reinforcing genders norms..
- If you're not trying to be seen as masculine for your lifestyle content, it's irrelevant to this comm. If you are trying to be seen as masculine, let's have a discussion about why these things are seen as masculine.

Resources:

What is toxic masculinity?

*The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love by Bell Hooks

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