like, flaccid button and hard slightly under average at best. There is a lot of hateful comments here that make me feel like shit. Please stop. Not every comrade with a penis has a good one. I'm tired of being reminded I can't pleasure partners if I ever stop being such a loser I can't get a partner. Honestly, I don't even try. Button dick stops me. Can we please at least stop the ableism here? I feel enough pain constantly going "oh I want to ask her out.... oh wait, I can't please her" already.

  • FourteenEyes [he/him]
    ·
    2 years ago

    My advice to them as a bald man is to get through the process of mourning your hair quickly and just start shaving. In a few months you stop giving a shit.

    What I do NOT recommend is trying to hide it (it doesn't work), using a hairpiece (people don't like them and interpret it as insecurity [which it kinda is]), using hair restoration products (they mostly don't work and are a waste of money), or getting cosmetic surgery (really expensive and IMO not worth the expense/risk)

    It sucks going bald, especially in your 20s, but it doesn't suck nearly as much as it used to, especially now that beards are in style again.

    • viva_la_juche [they/them, any]
      ·
      edit-2
      2 years ago

      interpret it as insecurity [which it kinda is]),

      I agree with you mostly but I think this attitude is kinda borne out of toxic masculinity tbh. Women wear wigs, weaves, and all manner of other stuff and it’s fine, men should be able to do the same. Some of the real hair hair systems that you cut into your hair are really nice and indistinguishable if they’re done right they’re just dumb expensive lol.

      • FourteenEyes [he/him]
        ·
        2 years ago

        Yes and unfortunately to socialize as a man you have to bear the existence of toxic masculinity in mind, as well as just general fashion trends

        Toupees are never fashionable or trendy and I have never seen them referenced in any context whatsoever but ridicule, and the bar for a good one, as you just pointed out, is being unable to tell it's not real hair

        Grabbing a razor and going full cueball is a cheap and easy option and it's one that is actually in fashion

        • viva_la_juche [they/them, any]
          ·
          edit-2
          2 years ago

          I guess but part of that is just people buying into it being normalized. Used to be weird for straight guys to wear make up and fingernail polish and now that’s changing. If I could afford them I’d definitely get one just to do different hairstyles for fun but I can’t lol.

      • FourteenEyes [he/him]
        ·
        2 years ago

        Or we can normalize not stigmatizing baldness which is a lot cheaper

          • FourteenEyes [he/him]
            ·
            2 years ago

            This was specifically in reference to a toupee worn specifically by a masc presenting cis man to hide the bald spot that society says he should be deeply ashamed of, and how most people will interpret you spending hundreds of dollars on a custom hairpiece to hide a part of your body you do not want people to look at.

            Sure, normalize wearing wigs. Fashion rules don't make any goddamn sense at all under serious scrutiny and I by and large don't pay attention to them because I have a hell of a time finding anything that even fits me to begin with.

            I just stated my advice which is stop agonizing over baldness as a cis man. After I stopped worrying about it and shaved my head it was a huge relief to my mental health, and I can only imagine how fucking horrible my anxiety would be if I was wearing a toupee to try and hide it if it was successful, let alone if it wasn't. And it would be money I desperately need for other things anyway.

            TLDR I'm sorry if my advice came across as rude or heteronormative, I'm just trying to help people with troubles I've already been through

    • RION [she/her]
      ·
      2 years ago

      As a not bald man (??? figuring that out atm but I've been living as a man hitherto) I don't think it's appropriate to give one size fits all advice here and this is pretty much the exact thing I dislike seeing. There's definitely a lot of hokum out there, and "restoration" of hair isn't really possible, but I've been on fin/minoxidil for about a year and it's done a good job at arresting the mild hair loss I was starting to see.

      I'm glad shaving it all off has worked out for you but pretending it's the only option isn't helpful. I like my hair, and I'd like to keep it for the time being.

      • FourteenEyes [he/him]
        ·
        2 years ago

        My personal experience with those is that eventually they stop working and I was just kicking the can down the road, and I regret ever spending any money on it.

        In the long run shaving your head is the strategy that works out best because you can't become balder and it's a look you can easily maintain the rest of your life. I am not giving one size fits all advice, just the advice that worked for me, and expounding the benefits of it.