just wanted to let everyone know that i do read everything, react IRL, and upbear. my social anxiety and ADHD has crawled even into my posting/commenting online which i was immune to when younger. i was wild in early forums and chatrooms
also not sure how long is too long to reply. things move slower in the lemmyverse but i'm so afraid of a reply being too "stale"
whats everyone else think about reply/comment protocol real or imagined?
It's good comradeship to agree with everything I say and upbear all my posts. Telling me I'm wrong or stinky is counterrevolutionary.
I don't think late replies are real. If the receiver isn't interested in the topic anymore they can just delete it from their inbox. NBD.
I don't reply to most comments because I don't have anything of interest to add. I still appreciate them though.
Engagement is engagement, as long as people like my posts then I am happy even if no one responds with a comment 😊
wish we had a button that does a special upbear that lets you reveal who did it
I wonder what it be like if the record of who upbears posts were public........
like the heart in yt comments section to show the OP liked a comment!
maybe an :upbear: emote to complement the downbear emote. i'd thought we had one. the perfect emote for when you can't find the perfect emote.
I also feel this anxiety in other parts of my life too.
I try to reply to everyone and I'm afraid it makes me come off as intense or competitive (like I need to get in the last word) when I'm really just trying to say I heard and read what you said. Or I try to make it clear I'm not upset with something or ignoring them on purpose.
My parents didn't pay much attention to me growing up, and I think that's something that affects the way I interact with people. I don't want people to feel like I'm ignoring them or that I don't care, so I try to reply when I can.
On the other hand, that's overwhelming, and honestly untenable. Otherwise, I would reply to my texts, emails, etc.
I don't think many people are built for all the ways we communicate these days.
wanted to add: a react emoji is cool and good way to reply in a conclusive and simple way but can't always find a perfect fit
we do almost have enough to have a star trek next generation picogram language soon!!!
If it's something I have a good response to, I will definitely keep it going
But usually I just make my jokey-joke-jokes and go on my merry way
i like when someone replies to me with a jokey joke because it feels conclusive
unless we are having a real convo but eventually those should move to dm or it petters out after a day
Same, I feel bad anytime I don't respond to anyone and I keep feeling bad when I think about it
same, and then I feel like im being really rude when I don't reply. also I don't want someone to feel ignored
I showed you my barely-coherent ramble about a subject you've never once heard of in your life.
Please respond.
I tend towards either anxiety-induced non-reponse and feeling bad about it or writing something way too long and worrying that I came off weird or that the person will feel obligated to respond (which filtered back through my own experience is tantamount to psychic violence).
Putting on my cognitive behavioral hat, making a late reply is good as a low stakes exposure exercise. You kill two birds with one stone--you show yourself that you can push through avoidance even after it has built up, and (with almost complete certainty) by receiving either no response or a neutral/positive response you can see that no calamity will befall you for daring to necro an old post.
i've gotten replies to comments i posted a day or two ago and i don't really think it's a big deal. and also i reply to things late sometimes cos i missed notif or whatever. so i imagine most people don't really mind.
but really, don't worry about it. for me at least, as soon as i comment something it has completely left my memory. so even if you're too anxious to reply i doubt anyone would be upset by that.
same. I don't like making the other person feel like I ignored their comment. Messenging apps like telegram and discord have emoji reacts that aren't quite replies and sometimes I wish I could do something like that on here
Same as you I try to at least say SOMETHING to everyone although that doesnt always happen
Posting/commenting gives me anxiety. People can be really mean online.
