What the fuck is up with this site and saying massive age gaps are absolutely fine? Last time it was with :libertarian-approaching: guys jumping in to say that a 28 year old being in a relationship with a 19 year old was good and cool and now we’re having the same struggle session about how it’s also fine for a 48 year old to be in a relationship with a 19 year old.
It is unambiguously creepy if someone is in a relationship with someone old enough to be their dad.
Because we as a society have come to the conclusion that a 19 year old is old enough to decide for themselves who they want to love. Simple as that. There's so much nuance to human relationships that get left out in these discussions and its exausting.
Im totally on board with calling it creepy if a 48 year old dates a 19 year old. With that said im also of the opinion that it should be legal. If you dont think it should be...you should have a discussion about a higher age of consent than 18 years.
I think consent is more complicated than you are giving credit for. I do not believe that an 18 year old is adult enough to consent to going out with a 50 year old as the reasons why a 50 year old dating a 17 year old is messed up are just as in play here. I do think an 18 year old can consent with a 20 year old
adulthood is not just a state you magically reach once you turn a certain age it is a complex societal idea referring to a persons level of development and it is also not a binary state
It's their business regardless. If you're going to start taking away agency from 18 year olds, then we should shift the voting age higher too because that's too young to make those kinds of decisions.
Adulthood vs. childhood is always going to face a fuzzy boundary and any line is going to be arbitrary for one reason or another. At a certain point, we have to consider people full legal persons with rights and responsibilities, and that includes the right to make mistakes. I think more restrictions and involving criminal systems is more likely to hurt than help. Affect this by way of social stigmatization, not legality.
Then that's a separate issue now isn't it? :gui-better: That's the point of a more equitable world - where people aren't grossly more powerful than others.
Ah so we're talking about the actual world. Then we should take into account the idea of increasing the power of policing and disproportionate impact of that on the poor and already marginalized.
People see rich and famous taking advantage of this because that's a system perpetuated, largely, by capitalism and massive social inequality. Same on the more pedestrian level. It's usually wealth and status that attract younger folks to an older partner. These are the same folks who get away with murder and aren't policed because they're white and well off already. Advocating for illegality is increasing a police state without actually hurting the people we consider unethical
it might just be a different experience of police but I've found that police take little or no interest in enforcing this sort of law. It's like how domestic abuse laws don't really get enforced even though they exist on paper.
I was not proposing making it a criminal act for the young women to be in these relationships but the older men
Hard disagree. Not about the monkey brain thing, but about legality binding people. So flippant about the policing necessary to enforce this kind of law.
It would be gross to apply that as a hard and fast rule, or to specifically go around chasing people of the lowest acceptable age specifically. But it at least captures the fact that as you get older, the acceptable age gap widens, but within limits.
What the fuck is up with this site and saying massive age gaps are absolutely fine? Last time it was with :libertarian-approaching: guys jumping in to say that a 28 year old being in a relationship with a 19 year old was good and cool and now we’re having the same struggle session about how it’s also fine for a 48 year old to be in a relationship with a 19 year old.
It is unambiguously creepy if someone is in a relationship with someone old enough to be their dad.
Because we as a society have come to the conclusion that a 19 year old is old enough to decide for themselves who they want to love. Simple as that. There's so much nuance to human relationships that get left out in these discussions and its exausting.
Im totally on board with calling it creepy if a 48 year old dates a 19 year old. With that said im also of the opinion that it should be legal. If you dont think it should be...you should have a discussion about a higher age of consent than 18 years.
an age of consent that considered age differences wouldn't be the worst idea
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I think consent is more complicated than you are giving credit for. I do not believe that an 18 year old is adult enough to consent to going out with a 50 year old as the reasons why a 50 year old dating a 17 year old is messed up are just as in play here. I do think an 18 year old can consent with a 20 year old
adulthood is not just a state you magically reach once you turn a certain age it is a complex societal idea referring to a persons level of development and it is also not a binary state
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it's difficult because the law is a blunt instrument and this is a nuanced issue.
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that wasn't my thinking. A 30 year old dating a 50 year old I would consider reasonable similarly for an 18 year old dating a 16 year old even.
people do a lot of growing up in their early 20s and I don't think anyone over 24 should be dating people under 20
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It's their business regardless. If you're going to start taking away agency from 18 year olds, then we should shift the voting age higher too because that's too young to make those kinds of decisions.
Adulthood vs. childhood is always going to face a fuzzy boundary and any line is going to be arbitrary for one reason or another. At a certain point, we have to consider people full legal persons with rights and responsibilities, and that includes the right to make mistakes. I think more restrictions and involving criminal systems is more likely to hurt than help. Affect this by way of social stigmatization, not legality.
Yeah it's funny seeing some here getting all "tough on crime" when it comes to this issue
"It's ICKY and it's okay when I don't like it :comfy:" This comm rn.
Ah yes, giving childish responses like this are totally a reflection of how much of a big, smart boy you are.
#gottem
taking your user a little too literally there
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A powerful rich man is above any social stigmatization an average person could level. Social stigma can only be used against people in your community
Then that's a separate issue now isn't it? :gui-better: That's the point of a more equitable world - where people aren't grossly more powerful than others.
ok but I was talking about how people should behave in the world we live in now not the world after we achieve socialism.
Ah so we're talking about the actual world. Then we should take into account the idea of increasing the power of policing and disproportionate impact of that on the poor and already marginalized.
People see rich and famous taking advantage of this because that's a system perpetuated, largely, by capitalism and massive social inequality. Same on the more pedestrian level. It's usually wealth and status that attract younger folks to an older partner. These are the same folks who get away with murder and aren't policed because they're white and well off already. Advocating for illegality is increasing a police state without actually hurting the people we consider unethical
it might just be a different experience of police but I've found that police take little or no interest in enforcing this sort of law. It's like how domestic abuse laws don't really get enforced even though they exist on paper.
I was not proposing making it a criminal act for the young women to be in these relationships but the older men
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Hard disagree. Not about the monkey brain thing, but about legality binding people. So flippant about the policing necessary to enforce this kind of law.
A lot of people (on all issues) think of law and enforcement as different things, when in reality they're inseparable.
Two sides same coin and all that.
I feel like age 18 is still a good voting age
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The ol' half your age plus seven thing strikes again.
It would be gross to apply that as a hard and fast rule, or to specifically go around chasing people of the lowest acceptable age specifically. But it at least captures the fact that as you get older, the acceptable age gap widens, but within limits.
I think they're just dating
Oh right I’ll edit it