If 2 people under age 18 start dating, and marry later, we don't say they groomed each other. At least if they were within 3 years of each other.
Then there's the somewhat poorly-named "Romeo and Juliet clauses". If a 21yo is dating a 17yo we don't call that pedophilia.
Age proximity matters. The idea that you should date a peer is central to the valueset of a balanced relationship. It's not surprising that marital age gaps are correlated with negative outcomes. Life partners should have life experiences that reasonably match up.
The "half your age plus seven" rule is just a line-of-best-fit. Other ways of expressing it are "twice your age minus 14", or "at 14 it starts to be morally feasible to have sexual expression with people your own age, and every year your age range of peers expands by 1 year above and 1/2 below".
But there is still a very common trend of sexual relationships where one party is for the "consumption" of the other. Class and age and social status and neurotype all play into this. I think it would be a mistake to not at least use some quantifiable factors as heuristics.
I think people here take grooming srsly, but don't care about age gaps between consenting adults. This is definitely an example of the former.
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If 2 people under age 18 start dating, and marry later, we don't say they groomed each other. At least if they were within 3 years of each other.
Then there's the somewhat poorly-named "Romeo and Juliet clauses". If a 21yo is dating a 17yo we don't call that pedophilia.
Age proximity matters. The idea that you should date a peer is central to the valueset of a balanced relationship. It's not surprising that marital age gaps are correlated with negative outcomes. Life partners should have life experiences that reasonably match up.
The "half your age plus seven" rule is just a line-of-best-fit. Other ways of expressing it are "twice your age minus 14", or "at 14 it starts to be morally feasible to have sexual expression with people your own age, and every year your age range of peers expands by 1 year above and 1/2 below".
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Vulnerability and power is a good point.
But there is still a very common trend of sexual relationships where one party is for the "consumption" of the other. Class and age and social status and neurotype all play into this. I think it would be a mistake to not at least use some quantifiable factors as heuristics.
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