In short, not at all; not ever. I've been in and out of therapy (back in currently). I have a few other dads I'm cool with at soccer practice, and coworkers as well. But honestly, not really anyone I would call if, say, I needed someone to just "be there" in a time of need.
Someone else pointed out in this thread as men we're told to get in touch and be better. And then when those eventual emotional insights are made reality kicks you in the balls: you have no friends outside of your family and hopefully your spouse or partner. Men my age are wholly transactional. Work and status (totally intertwined) are all that matters.
That's sorta true. But since I'm "in the club" it basically goes like this and i think its even more emotionally depraved than just trying to sell you something:
Parents get together for Event X (example: soccer game), dudes gather around to talk shop, everyone complains about work (this can last for hours), drinks flow, dudes now start letting loose... and everyone basically talks about their hobby (usually consumerist based) while other dads figure out if they personally will throw their money away on the same or similar venture. Example: Dude A buys a fishing pole, goes fishing, catches 10 fish. Other dads will then ask for amplifying details (how much did the reel cost? Where did you go fishing?) and this constitutes sharing.
By the way, I'm not even accounting for the bros who like sports. And that's another level I can't begin to explain. Personally I don't care about sports which has resulted in many dads calling me gay (but please tell me more about who "looks good on the field" since grown men chasing balls while grown men watch on them on TV is soooooo hetero).
To be fair, some bros might help each other out (working on cars) but the expectation is tit for tat - I work on your car, you work on mine next weekend. Ultimately though, there is no support system beyond Show & Tell - Mid 40s Edition.
Male, hetero, Gen X.
In short, not at all; not ever. I've been in and out of therapy (back in currently). I have a few other dads I'm cool with at soccer practice, and coworkers as well. But honestly, not really anyone I would call if, say, I needed someone to just "be there" in a time of need.
Someone else pointed out in this thread as men we're told to get in touch and be better. And then when those eventual emotional insights are made reality kicks you in the balls: you have no friends outside of your family and hopefully your spouse or partner. Men my age are wholly transactional. Work and status (totally intertwined) are all that matters.
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That's sorta true. But since I'm "in the club" it basically goes like this and i think its even more emotionally depraved than just trying to sell you something:
Parents get together for Event X (example: soccer game), dudes gather around to talk shop, everyone complains about work (this can last for hours), drinks flow, dudes now start letting loose... and everyone basically talks about their hobby (usually consumerist based) while other dads figure out if they personally will throw their money away on the same or similar venture. Example: Dude A buys a fishing pole, goes fishing, catches 10 fish. Other dads will then ask for amplifying details (how much did the reel cost? Where did you go fishing?) and this constitutes sharing.
By the way, I'm not even accounting for the bros who like sports. And that's another level I can't begin to explain. Personally I don't care about sports which has resulted in many dads calling me gay (but please tell me more about who "looks good on the field" since grown men chasing balls while grown men watch on them on TV is soooooo hetero).
To be fair, some bros might help each other out (working on cars) but the expectation is tit for tat - I work on your car, you work on mine next weekend. Ultimately though, there is no support system beyond Show & Tell - Mid 40s Edition.