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Life is hard folks. I just moved to a new city and my partner just got out of long term treatment. They’re moving to the same city as me but we are living separately and probably starting divorce stuff in the Fall. Im letting them stay with me for the next week or so but my friends are really skeptical because of what’s happened between us in the past, which I’m thankful for but all my support being mad at me doesn’t make things easier. I want to believe that my partner has changed for the better but I can’t let go of what they did to me in the past. It’s all so difficult and sticky. Just venting.
Good luck, comrade. Will the two of you remain in contact after the divorce?
It remains to be seen honestly. I wanted to be fully separate and go no contact when they came back but we have so much stuff to sort through because of the move that that wasn’t practical. I originally planned to go fully no contact in August but I want to help them with the move. It’s hard because their family is all gone and I’m all they have. I don’t know how to handle it. Right now I’m just being selfish even though it might be unsafe to keep them around.
That sounds like a complex situation. I hope you're able to figure something out
Thank you comrade. I think the important thing is for me to keep prioritizing my well being and safety because my partner hasn’t in the past.
I banned myself from twitter about two weeks ago, I can only access the site now for 30 minutes a day (I’m locked out with a password only my spouse knows). I think I’m experiencing twitter withdrawal. I used to spend three hours a day on that fucking place. And my profile was just starting to get some traction. I was thinking about it a lot even when I wasn’t there. And now it’s just helping me realize how much I lean(ed) on social media to make up for my shitty social life. Many times now I’ll start feeling lonely the instant I’m not busy with work or chores. My spouse works nights and sleeps most days and my kids play outside almost all day long now. Everyone else in the neighborhood is either a landlord or a landlord wannabe. There is no one to hang out with! I’m dying for social contact but I can’t stand these fucking people! My last few friends all live faraway and have just intensified their lib politics lately. Anyone who needs someone to talk with, message me and we’ll figure out how to use an anonymous voice app or something. I don’t care who you are or what kind of problems you have, I just want to vibe with communists.
I'm in touch with a number of users here outside the site. If you have DIscord or something, DM me and I'll give you my name!
Been getting a lot more interaction with people as of late which is really really nice, my life is still a bit of a mess though and I'm trying to get my shit together. Life is so momentum based and when I stop even for a second I feel like I'm dead in the water. I wanted a bit of a breather back in May and I haven't been able to get back to doing shit since then. I feel like a shark that will die if it stops swimming. I'll eventually get back into the swing of things, it's just taking the first step is the hardest
Feel that. I have to really work up the will to get things done, especially at work, but once I start I just go. It feels good to be productive, but when I take a break, I lose all desire to start back up again.
Throw a thread up in the mutual aid comm if you haven't already!
I dunno. I feel icky asking for help when I know there's comrades out there who need it more than we do. We've got our community garden and food library to lean on, and our credit isn't so far in the toilet that missing another mortgage payment is gonna sink us.
Just remember the people here are happy to help - I know from experience. Hope you get through this period of uncertainty!
Got my meds this morning, plan on ordering food today. Alright I suppose, just another day.
Pizza is usually the most bang for my buck, 2 pizzas last me two days, until I can get to the grocery store on Friday.
Yeah there's a place here in my town that grubhub delivers so I'm going to splurg a bit on it.
I'm trying to disengage from . I stopped commenting, edited and deleted all of my comments and unsubbed from most subs but I still find myself going there and even clicking on my username to see what karma I've accumulated on the comments I haven't made. While I love all my comrades here, there are just not enough clickable things per hour to make up a constant distraction machine, and I don't think finding new way to go click-click-click from work ending until I go to bed is really the move anyway. I'll watch shows but then pause because I have this fomo about somebody having posted something there or here in the last 3 minutes. I'm not even trying to watch anything deep or plodding, I'll pause Nora from Queens to check for distractions. It's really frustrating, but the frustration apparently isn't enough to force me to go out and find some other way to spend my time.
I'm honestly the same way with Hexbear. I'm...quite literally pretty much always around. Good luck! I don't really have much advice here.
I'm about halfway through my week and I made breakfast for myself and my partner this morning.
I really really hate going to bed and then getting out of bed, but I wanted to do something nice for my partner and sometimes the potential guilt of not meeting an obligation works as motivation.
I don't think that's a viable long-term solution, using others to motivate me to do things, and I guess it's a part of codependency, but I'm hoping I'll fake it until I make it and start deciding that making breakfast for me alone is a good enough reason to get out of bed.
Started a medication and that's been very helpful in noticing those thought processes instead of going on autopilot, which was the way I've done things for the last 20~ years. I'm not looking forward to the work I need to do and continue to do, but at least now I'm starting to know what it is.
Glad you're able to find something that helps! I've been finishing up stabilizing my BP2 med dosage, then I hope to talk to my doctor about finding something similar to what you described.
Also, breakfast is lovely :)
Thanks! It's taken a long time to get some answers but I'm thankful I got lucky. And congrats on getting some clarity on medication and dosage! It's hard enough getting medical help, even moreso when it's to improve mental health.