There’s a version of political power that operates the way a motorcade does—slicing through empty roads, flouting rules, making regular folks wait behind barricades. And there’s a version of political power as Jill Biden embodies it, and as she expressed it at the Women for Biden event in Bloomington. This is power from the ground up, built on listening and coalition building. “They underestimate our power because they don’t understand it,” the first lady told the crowd. “They see our empathy and compassion as a vulnerability. But we know they’re what give us the clarity to fight for what’s right.” And in so doing, chip away at the hard problems. That’s the gig. Negotiate, reconsider your assumptions, and sometimes, agree to disagree, agree to lose. Only a tyrant would say otherwise.

In this case: listening, ignoring what everyone around you is saying, and losing.